For the love that holds us whole
by aretha85
Summary: In every life time they where cursed to lose each other. But maybe this time they have a chance. They just needed people to accept them, accept their love . Arthur/Merlin. Please read and review
1. Chapter 1

Arthur couldn't believe his luck. His first day back to his office in "Pendragon Corp.", the family company, and he was already twenty minutes late. His father wouldn't like that, no matter he was still recovering from last month's car accident which had left him with a huge scar on his chest after going out from the windshield. Thankfully he wasn't going very fast and so his minor injuries weren't enough for his father to show his worry.

He parked his new car outside of the building and tried to hurry but when he made it to the front door he stumbled into something and spilled all of his coffee on his white shirt. "Just great" he thought when he turned to see who had caused the accident. A boy was lying on the floor a few feet away from him and Arthur had already started getting angry. He recognized him as Morgana's secretary and couldn't help himself at the thought of his overbearing step-sister.

"Don't you look where you are going? Look what you've done!"

The boy didn't even lift his eyes from the floor as Arthur was clearly in one of his infamous moods.

"That's it? Not even an apology? I see Morgana hasn't trained you enough"

"But It wasn't my fault!" managed the boy as he was hurt when someone talked about his boss like that. She had given him a chance and a job when no one else would, despite his diplomas, when he got out from rehab. For him she was the most kind and just person although, admittedly, she was giving Arthur a very hard time.

"You really have some nerve!" the young Pendragon spat when he heard someone clear his throat behind him. He turned hoping that it was security so he could get rid of this ungrateful boy.

"Come on, that's enough. You have your fun my friend!" a young man around his age or maybe a couple of years younger, told him. He was as tall as he, but quite the opposite in everything else. His hair was black in complete antithesis with Arthur's blond ones, and he was skinny and pale while Arthur was more muscular and golden. His eyes were looking at him clear and clever and he was trying to hide a very amused grin.

"Excuse me, do I know you?"

"Not really. My name is Merlin Emrys."The boy tried to give him his hand good-naturedly but Arthur was late, covered in coffee and he was having none of that.

"And yet you called me friend!"

"Sorry, my mistake. I could never be friends with someone who could be such a prat".

That was the last drop.

"Security" Arthur yelled and within seconds, the boy was back at Morgana's office and Merlin was escorted outside not so kindly, no matter that he was trying to explain that someone was actually waiting for him in the company.

As soon as Arthur was finally behind his office, his father decided that It was time for another lecture, just what his son needed after a great morning and the hell he's been through since the accident. Uther kept going about how he was late (of course), how he didn't respect his work and the opportunities that he gave him while growing up and, Arthur's personal favorite, how he was less and less capable to handle this kind of work when he was already so behind the schedule. It didn't seem to matter the fact that he was even working from the hospital as to secure their last client. The young man kept listening in silence, his head low, hoping it will finish soon and he can actually return to work from which his father kept destructing him despite the fact that he was yelling that it was Arthur's fault.

"Merlin" Morgana shouted as she gestured to the young man who has just entered the small café. Merlin hurried her way relieved that he wasn't too much late again. They've been friends for five years now, they had met each other in college and Morgana could be really protective around him, almost as bitch as she could be to Arthur. She thought that someone should be kind to him after everyone else seemed to use him for his willingness to help everyone that crossed his path.

"What happened?" Morgana asked worried. "I was expecting you this morning at my office and you didn't even called. I was worried!"

"Sorry", Merlin gave her a puppy-eyed look "but I was really there". Morgana looked at him incredulously.

"He threw me out!" Merlin continued exasperated.

"Who?"

"I don't know who he was! He was just bullying a young boy and I short of scolded him and he started going mental so I called him prat and he called the security! I tried to explain but no one listened me and then I thought to call you but I realized I had forgot my phone home".

Morgana was hearing him babbling with so much affection, she liked that part of Merlin so much that was cheering her up every time. But suddenly his words sounded too familiar as she remembered a very scared Owen telling him about his encounter with her brother this morning.

"Wait a minute! How was that man?"

"Around my age, tall , blond, with beautiful eyes and really masculine. No doubt he could throw me out himself If he wasn't afraid he would wrinkle his suit. And sooo arrogant!".

"That should be interesting" answered Morgana with a mental smirk to herself.

"What?"

"Nothing. Oh, my brother is joining as for a coffee, I hope that you don't mind. You will really like him!"

"Ok, sure!" Merlin was always excited to meet new people, especially if this guy was as beautiful as his sister.

That moment the door flew open. Arthur Pendragon waved at his sister and then left staring at the man across the table.

"You!" He yelled.

Morgana couldn't stop laughing while Merlin was trying to figure out if he could fit underneath the table.


	2. Chapter 2

_To AmandaFray: The next chapter as I promised_

_Thank you all for your hits and please note that English is not my primary language._

Morgana was watching amused while the two men were exchanging insults. After the first sock, Merlin had found his tongue and was speaking back to Arthur with much more mischievousness than he would like to admit even to himself. After all he couldn't help but notice that the blond was really breathtaking and every reaction he had to his retorts, Merlin only thought it was quite cute.

"If you bothered to be nice and introduce yourself we wouldn't be in this mess right now!"Merlin yelled finally after an offensive comment from Arthur about his slim figure and his big ears being funny while he tried to appear mature.

"So now that you know that I am Arthur Pendragon I expect an apology is in order", he couldn't hide his smugness. Merlin kept staring at him incredulously and Morgana knew what it was about to come. Her friend was always gentle unless someone was being rude and unfair and he had already put up with a lot from her brother.

"I'm sorry, I should never call you a brat while clearly you are not", his voice clearly ironic but Arthur was too pleased with himself to notice. "You are only a spoiled kid, clearly your father's son, with as much tact as an elephant, too pleased with himself to notice everyone else around him. And to think I was resolved to be nice to you only because you were Morgana's brother but I can see now why, although she loves you, she is always annoyed by you. You wouldn't tell the difference between friends and enemies even if your life was depending on it!" And with these last words he emptied a glass of water that was in front of him right on his face.

Arthur was shocked and Morgana was watching now terrified as though Merlin had take it a step too far and she was sure her brother would snap any time now and tear her friend in pieces. But Arthur was anything but angry as many other thoughts rushed through his mind at the same time. Merlin was quite beautiful. His dark hair looked really cute around his pale face and the ears that he made fun of didn't look bad at all but in perfect harmony with his entire figure. The blush that was now covering his cheekbones was rather adorable, and the regret that was now forming in his eyes for his actions was enough to reconsider his own words and cruelness. He couldn't also help but admire the young man for his attitude, no one but Morgana had ever stood up on him and it was really refreshing. If he could get past his own proudness he could really get along with him very well.

Suddenly it occurred to him that his thoughts were very contradictious and as he looked back at Merlin he saw him staring at him with his mouth open like a fish, like a kid waiting for his punishment. So he couldn't really help himself when he finally burst into laughing so hard he almost cried. Morgana let out a sigh of relief while Merlin looked at him like he had a mental affliction or something.

"Well Merlin" Arthur finally said "I think we have misunderstood each other so let's start over shall we? I'm Arthur Pendragon, really pleased to meet you and hope you will forgive my previous remarks". Merlin hesitated but he also knew that it was the closest think he would ever get in an apology.

"Come on Merlin, I don't bite" Arthur kept giving him his hand and winked at him. Merlin couldn't help but smile while he was trying to ignore the strange feeling in his stomach as he took Arthur's hand.

"Merlin Emrys, as I have already said. And you should go dry yourself, I'm really sorry about that".

"Well I can't say that he didn't deserve it". Morgana answered in his place while Arthur was already heading for the bathroom causing Merlin to blush even more.

When Arthur returned though, there was only Merlin sitting on the table.

"Morgana's gone she said something has came up and she has to go back to work". The blond shrugged and kept his thoughts to himself "If it was about work I would have been informed too. What is she up to now?"

"Ok. So do you want to hung out? Maybe a beer or something?" he said instead without pausing to think.

"Sure, why not?"

A couple of hours later they were sitting on a bench outside the "Camelot King" club. It was getting rather crowded in there and Arthur had to actually carry a dizzy Merlin outside.

"Sorry about that, I just don't get along well with many people at once".

"What do you mean?" Arthur couldn't help but ask because Merlin was the one who had suggested this club in the first place.

"I had an…accident a few months ago"

"So? Public humiliation isn't your thing then?" Arthur was being his usual ironic and arrogant self and Merlin started getting irritated.

"Forget I even said anything about it", he turned to get back inside but Arthur stopped him.

"Look, I'm sorry mate. I just can't help it sometimes". The sincerity in his eyes was enough for Merlin who just smiled back at him and sat down again.

Arthur was cursing himself. He only meant it as a joke but clearly it must have been something serious judging by Merlin's hurt expression. It was that moment that he decided that his new _friend _didn't deserve such behavior from anyone and he promised himself that he would always have a smiling Merlin by his side as long as he could help it. And even though the fact that he was now whishing that he could have Merlin around should be enough to scare him away, he couldn't fight the feeling of completeness that surrounded him around the brunette. He was hoping that Merlin wasn't thinking him as an ass already and that he would grant him a second (no third, really) chance. He was mystified about the beautiful (because yes, he was very beautiful) boy who could be sad and happy at the same time.

Merlin on the other hand, was occupying himself with much more entertaining thoughts. He liked imagining Arthur's pouty lips kissing him and he was enjoying the way his hair was falling in his eyes. Each time he had to resist the urge to reach out at him and push it back so he could admire his baby blue eyes better. He liked the way his slim fingers were holding the bottle of beer and was sure that beneath his T-shirt he hid an amazing body. He wasn't at all surprised when after a few hours spending with him he found himself already in love with Arthur Pendragon. After all he could be really nice if he wanted to and he had already apologized to him twice while Morgana had informed him that the word "sorry" wasn't in her brother's vocabulary. So, that should count for something right?

"Sooo, you and my sister huh? I never see that coming, you don't look like her type. So sweet…"Arthur spoke after a long pause.

"What? Oh, no no no! Me and her, definitely no! We are just friends... From college". Merlin was panicking. If he had any hope at all, surely it wouldn't help if Arthur thought of him as a pair with Morgana. Little did he know that Arthur was only trying to figure out his next move.

"Oh? Sorry I just thought…"He tried to fight down an unexplainable relief.

"Wait, you think I'm sweet?" Merlin interrupted him with a goofy grin spreading across his face. Arthur turned red in an instant.

"Well, you know…I just meant. Well yes, you are actually very sweet and funny". He smiled back and that made Merlin trust him completely (he was really cute when he was looking at him like that) and let down any guard he might still have

"Anyway, it wouldn't serve well for Morgana with me being gay and all". He said jokingly but wishing with all his heart that Arthur wouldn't turn him down.

"Oh" was all Arthur said before he lost himself into his thoughts again. He was admiring the younger man for admitting it so openly. He himself couldn't say he had any special preferences. He had slept with a few guys before especially during college but nothing serious. Since then he had only women, and most of them were very annoying like his last one, Vivian. Only the thought of her made him shiver. His father never knew anything about it of course. He was trying to make him proud very hard and he never seemed to getting the hand of it so a disappointment like this was out of the question. But he was starting to feel that he could never say no to any of Merlin's talents.

Merlin mistook his silence for rejection and casted his eyes on the pavement. When Arthur realized that, he immediately tried to explain himself.

"No , I didn't mean anything. Really Merlin, I'm quite proud of you admitting it out loud".

" So you have no problem with it then?"

"Why would I? You only took me by surprise" Arthur smiled as he let his hand slide towards Merlin's hip causing him to gasp loud. Arthur's smile widened and he entwined their fingers.

"So what do you say we get out of here? My place is nearby".

Merlin just nodded and let him take him to his apartment as a shiver run through his spine.


	3. Chapter 3

Merlin wasn't sure at all if he wanted it to happen. He liked Arthur a lot, but it was too soon for him to take the next step, his insecurities flooding his mind. And yet, there he was, in Arthur's apartment drinking wine and laughing unconcernedly at the man. He couldn't resist, he was dashing.

Somehow Arthur during the night had moved closer to him on the couch and had put a hand around his shoulder, holding him even closer. The heat was radiating from both of them and Merlin couldn't help but blush as Arthur raised his hand and started stroking his dark hair nonchalantly. The older man was doing his best to woo Merlin and the fact that the other man looked so shy was turning him on even more. So, when he noticed him blushing with a small move like that he couldn't resist any longer. Eagerly, but carefully as not to scare him away, closed the distance between them and gently, brushed his lips against Merlin's who, although surprised, kissed him back even more eagerly.

A hundred thoughts crossed Arthur's mind. Merlin's lips were soft and he was very beautiful, unresistable. He was trembling beneath his touch and the blond couldn't but moan as the wonderful sensation spread through his entire body. This felt so right. Merlin on the other hand was completely lost into Arthur. His lips felt perfect against his own, and as he held him close he realized he was even more well-built as he had thought at first. He waked up from his stupor though when Arthur suddenly moved his hand underneath his shirt and started stroking his pale skin. He ended the kiss abruptly and jerked back to the couch without noticing the other man's disappointed look. Arthur tried to compose himself before saying anything.

"Merlin are you all right?"

The brunette swallowed with difficulty and started getting up. He didn't think that Arthur would be so bold from the first night. There were thinks that he hadn't told him yet and despite the fact that he knew that he could absolutely trust him, the remembrance of some old events held him back.

"Yes uhmm, sorry but I have to go?"

"Right now?"

"I just re…remembered I have so…something to do". He stammered.

"Merlin it's two o'clock in the bloody morning!"

"I'm so sorry", he ran to the door without turning to look back.

The next month passed in haze for both of them. Arthur was really angry, he couldn't understand Merlin's behavior at all. He was certain he liked him back, he most definitely kissed him back! So, why all the stammering and all the running? It was so childish of him and Arthur did his best to forget him. He didn't succeeded though. After all Merlin was the first man who caught his eye in years.

Merlin on the other hand was both terrified and relieved. Relieved that he had the strength to walk away (Arthur definitely had already much power over him" and terrified because now he was regretting it. It didn't help at all that whenever he came upon Morgana and her brother was with her, Arthur would just take off without even saying hello. Did he hate him that much, did he loose his interest in him so soon or was it a onetime thing for him?

Morgana, being her usual self was trying to put some sense back into her brother.

"Arthur, you are really hurting him with this behavior" she told him one day when she came storming into his office. "Can't you see it?"

"No. And stop it! I've heard enough for him Morgana, I'm warning you".

"Well I know him better than anyone and I can see it. He doesn't deserve this, just go and talk to him".

"Well, he hurt me first", he mumbled but it was enough for her to hear him.

"What? You mean he just hurt your ego or he actually _hurt_ your _feelings_?"

"Look Morgana, I actually like him. A lot. But if he didn't want this he could just have said so or stop me before I acted on it, but instead he responded. And then he took off like someone was chasing him. What does that tell you?"

"That he likes you so much that he got scared?"

"Haha, so funny. I know that he's your friend but I'm your brother. I'm not asking you to choose sides but just let me be, please. It's enough that I can't stop thinking of him every single second of every single day". He gasped and put his hands in his mouth as he didn't mean to say that out loud. Morgana smirked. She had won the argument and now new that it was a matter of time before Arthur would give in to her demand".

"So you admit it! I knew it!" He didn't answer but she saw his blush and decided to take it easy on him.

"You know you can talk to me Arthur. I can see that it troubles you a lot, maybe I can help". She started massaging his shoulders and he relaxed under her embrace.

"I think…I think that this is serious. I've never felt so strong about anyone before. He managed to captivate me from the very beginning, when he stood up to me. I am not really angry with him but with myself. Somehow I've already scared him away, I screwed up Morgana. And I don't know what to do. Every time I see him I feel like I'm causing him some discomfort and so I have to leave".

Morgana never imagined that her brother would be so upset about someone and even more for a man. She knew about his adventures in college but she always thought of it like some sort of experiments, she never had actually be a witness in any of these. The were some distant events. She loved her brother very much, and she cared about Merlin too, so she decided to do her best to help them both.

"Look, I'm his friend and I'm telling you that he likes you."

"Really?" Arthur's face lit up.

"Really Arthur", Morgana couldn't help but smile. "There are some things about Merlin that you don't know, and I can't tell you because it's very personal and he doesn't want to talk about it. But I'm sure that if you give him a chance he will tell you everything by himself. Doesn't he deserve a chance Arthur? Don't you deserve a chance?"

"Yeah, I guess he does."

"Alright then" and with that, she left.

Moments after, Arthur was already typing a message on his phone.

"_Want to meet? Please answer me, I know I've been an ass but we really need to talk"_

It took Merlin only a few seconds to answer back.

"_Sure, and thank you for this. 7 o'clock it's ok?"_

"_Yes, I'll meet you at the café we met the first time with "_

"_Ok. See you then"_

He put the phone down and smiled to himself.


	4. Chapter 4

"_You reached Morgana Pendragon. Please leave a message and I'll call you back as soon as possible"._

"He didn't show up! He didn't fucking show up Morgana! I was waiting for him for almost two hours and he didn't even bothered to call to say that he couldn't make it! If I ever listen to you again… _beeeeep"_

He called again.

"If I ever listen to you again it would be because I'll be dead. What do you have to say for your little friend now eh?"

Arthur was furious and Morgana couldn't really blame him. What the hell was wrong with Merlin? It's not like Arthur Pendragon lusts after you every so often and he certainly would never try that hard for anyone else. Why was that boy so scared? Arthur was actually sweet and when he loved someone he did it with all his heart. She needed to fix this somehow but before she even thought for anything to do, the two men were right back on track.

Arthur was lying on his expensive sofa, drinking some beer and watching something in TV. He didn't really know what it was because most of the time he was just staring at it while imagining Merlin kissing him on this very piece of furniture. When the doorbell rang, he immediately thought it was Morgana who had come to scold him and talk him into giving her _friend_ another chance, so he got ready to fight on the spot. Imagine his surprise when he answered the door and in front of him was standing a very contrite Merlin. His eyes were red like he had been crying before, and he looked really cold.

"Hey, can I come in?"

Arthur, instead of answering, he shut the door right on his face and went back to his couch. But Merlin wouldn't give up so easily so he kept knocking as long as it will take for Arthur to become angry enough to hear him out. Finally the older man stood up and opened the door again.

"What do you want Merlin?"

"Please, just…There is something I need to talk to you about".

"Was the cafeteria where we suppose to meet inconvenient for you?"The irony would normally infuriate Merlin but he only cared for Arthur right now.

"I actually came if you must know".

"Really? And how did you manage to become invisible M_er_lin" Arthur said mocking the other's name.

"I did come! I just didn't come in... I was outside the whole time, watching you".

"Watching me", Arthur was going mad."So what? You wanted to see how long would I wait for you? Is that some sort of a sick joke or something or you just needed to boost your ego?"

"Please, Arthur it's not what you think. Just let me talk to you…Please…Hear me out and then if you still want me to go then I promise I will, and I will never bother you again. And I will lay Morgana of off you!"

Arthur managed to smile with this last comment as he eventually let Merlin in. The dark haired boy sat on the couch and looked around nervously when Arthur sat next to him.

"So? I'm listening".

Merlin took a deep breath before he spoke again.

"There are some things about me, some things that have_**happened**_ to me so I don't know how to behave around people anymore. It's really hard for me to trust, and I only trust Morgana because I knew her for a very long time, I knew her from…before". He looked up to Arthur to judge if it was ok for him to continue. Arthur just nodded.

"Before what Merlin?"

He hesitated before he answered. How could he say this to him without Arthur thinking of him as damaged?

"Morgana and I are really close but she wasn't my best friend until a few months back. That would be a guy from my neighborhood, Gwaine. We actually grew up together. Around five months ago I finally told him about me, that I'm gay".

" So? You told that to me almost immediately after we met".

"I did because of the events that I'm about to tell you. I just wanted to be clear with you from the beginning. Besides, it's not the same. I knew Gwaine to be racist sometimes but I really needed him to accept me for who I am. I think that I was secretly hoping that he valued our friendship enough to come to terms with it. Your sister already had and she wasn't as close to me as he was".

"I guess that he didn't then?"

"No" Merlin shook his head."He was kind enough not to say anything in front of me but everything was very different. He wasn't at ease when we were together, he wouldn't answer my calls or any of my messages, he was trying to give me a message I guess which I was reluctant to decrypt". He paused as Arthur went to the kitchen and brought back a bottle of beer for him. He accepted it, glad that he was still listening to his story.

"Anyways", he continued " we finally got together to the same room at the club you and I were the other night. It was a friend's birthday. Gwen's! You know Gwen!"

Arthur sighed. He was glad that there was a person who could actually picture in his mind, it felt like Merlin wasn't lying to him then. He prompted him to continue.

"Gwaine was drunk, as usual, and I myself was a little lightheaded so I let down my guard around him. After some hours I needed to go to the bathroom and as I was trying to pass through my friends I inattentively put my hand on his back trying to push through. He jerked back and started yelling at me in the middle of the club that I was a fag and never to touch him again and things like that".

"What exactly did he tell you Merlin?"

Merlin just shrugged.

"All that matters is that I left soon after that. But a company of other drunks had heard us and followed me outside. I was too much deep into thought to notice, until they came really close and started calling me names and…touching me".

Arthur was now holding his breath. He wasn't sure that he needed to hear the next part but Merlin was trying hard to be brave about it so he ought it to him to listen. Besides, if something so bad had happened to him then maybe all his actions were justified and there was still hope for the two of them.

"What did they do you? It's ok, you can tell me."

"They…they bit me almost to death" Merlin was actually crying now as the other man took his hand but said nothing.

"And you want to know the best part? Just before I fell unconscious I saw Gwaine with the corner of my eyes watching us from the club's entrance. He just stood there and did nothing. I…I felt so betrayed. And I swear I saw him smiling!"

Arthur allowed him a moment to calm his sobbing before he urged him to go on.

"What happened then? Did someone else come out?"

"Next thing I remember, I was waking up in a hospital after four days. Only Morgana was there. She explained to me that they had found me lying on the pavement when they left the club, two hours after me! Gwaine was with them…He just returned inside and kept drinking while I was bleeding to death…I never told Morgana though that he has there, and you shouldn't either."

"Ok, I won't. She will probably murder him and I'd have to bail her out". Merlin managed a painful smile at this.

"I spent a week at the hospital but no one else was coming to visit me except her and Gwen and I was really curious. As it turned out, the rest had heard Gwaine's remarks and tried to back off a little. I don't know if it is because of me or if they just don't want to choose sides. After everything that happened I didn't really care enough to find out. Well that's it Arthur, that's my story."

"And why are you telling this to me now?"

" I've been betrayed by people who I loved very much, who knew my whole life but who didn't care for me if I was alive or not. When you came in my life I wanted so much to leave all of these behind but in the end I couldn't and for that I'm really sorry. I like you Arthur, I really do and I really want to try. That is, if you want me…" He trailed off.

Arthur said nothing and kept staring on the floor. Merlin had suffered a trauma and he wasn't ready to let go of it just yet. How could he help him? He should find a way soon because he was more than certain that he wanted him in his life. If he had to build his trust on him slowly, he would do it even if it took him years. And then he remembered something.

"You kissed me back!"

"Of course I did. I told you Arthur, I really like you".

"But when I tried to touch you you…"

"…flinched? I just… I didn't want you to see me like this".

"Like what Merlin?"

Merlin carefully lifted his shirt up to his chest. Arthur gasped as he saw the marks on his pale skin. Cuts and bruises where still visible and for what he could tell he must had broken some ribs also.

"It's from that night. It's like they don't want to heal, as reminders of a punishment I deserved to get". He casted his eyes on the floor and tears started coming down again. Arthur slowly lifted his chin with his fingers, looked him in his beautiful eyes and leaned closer.

"No one deserves this Merlin, and most of all you", and he brushed their lips smoothly. Merlin shivered.

"Do you still want me to go?" he said with his eyes closed, afraid of what he was going to hear.

"No Merlin. Not now, and not ever. I'm going to keep you Merlin, I'm not going to be one of those that casted you away. Can you trust me to do that?" Merlin opened his eyes and smiled a watery smile.

"Yes, I think I can do that".

"Good…I like you too Merlin, you make my life look meaningful. I need you in my life and I can wait forever for you to be ready. Just don't give up on us before we even try. Before I ever try to make you believe in me".

Merlin was suddenly so happy. He was forgiven and accepted. Arthur was not disgusted of him, he wanted him. He abruptly jumped on Arthur's lap and rested his head on his shoulder.

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I promise I will do my best for you."

Arthur buried his nose in that dark hair and inhaled deeply.

"Merlin, my Merlin…I will never let you go again so if you are going to run again do it now".

"Never".

They stayed like this for what seemed like hours until finally Merlin stood up.

"It's getting late. I should probably go home".

"No" Arthur panicked and grabbed Merlin's wrist. He flinched." Sorry I didn't mean to scare you. Please…just stay with me. I promise I won't touch you, I won't do anything you don't want to. Just stay".

"Ok", was the only answer he got from a very joyful Merlin.

Not wanting Merlin to be afraid of the situation between them, he gave him his bed but he took the sofa instead of joining him. But Merlin had other plans. Arthur woke up in the middle of the night by Merlin's hand who was standing in front of him and was stroking his hair. He looked up at him sleepily.

"What's wrong?"

"Do I fit in there?"

"Always", the blond smiled and took the other man in his arms and carefully put him down next to him covering him with his blanket. Merlin just snuggled closer and melted into Arthur's embrace and wonderful scent.

Arthur couldn't fall asleep again. He just waited there till morning came, with Merlin in his arms and peace in his mind.

_Author's note:_

_Please review and tell me what you want to read next. It's going to turn angsty soon.._


	5. Chapter 5

They were celebrating two months together and Arthur couldn't be happier. Merlin was sweet and kind and he would make all this kind of small gestures when Arthur was tired or when he really had a bad day that would cheer him up in an instant. They still hadn't slept together and Arthur couldn't find himself to bother. He was secretly admiring his self for that and he wasn't pressing him at all. Merlin lying in his arm asleep, feeling his breath on his neck was enough for now. What had started as a physical attraction had now become something very deep and although sometimes it scared him, most of the time he just enjoyed having him around. It wasn't that he didn't like him that way, not at all. He had found himself hard many times during a night with Merlin cuddled up against him and he would finish himself of in the bathroom without even the brunette notice, but only the thought that a movement like this could scare him away, made Arthur consider his action for the second time since he met Merlin.

Merlin on the other hand wasn't ungrateful. He could see that Arthur actually cared and he was thankful that he didn't puss him. But he knew that it was time to give something back and so, when Arthur asked him to announce their relationship for the 100th time, he finally gave in.

Only Morgana, of course, knew that the two of them were together and only because she caught them sleeping in the couch that first morning when she came to pick up Arthur for work. And naturally, it fell to her to organize the whole think, hosting a wonderful dinner in her place. No family, just friends as Merlin was already in hysterics. He had actually invited Gwaine, despite the fact that his boyfriend was clearly against that, but Merlin knew that since no one knew what had actually transpired that night, it would raise questions and that they would accuse him for not trying. And he wanted somuch to try. There were also Gwen and her fiancé Lancelot, they both had grew up with Arthur and Morgana, Leon, Morgana's new love interest, and Percival with his girlfriend Freya who were Gwaine's friends from school and so Merlin's too.

When they arrived at the apartment everyone was already there and Merlin's breath caught as he spotted Gwaine smiling at him across the room with irony on his face. Arthur's grip tighten around him and he forced a shy smile.

The dinner itself wasn't actually bad. Although Morgana couldn't even boil an egg and had insisted on ordering from a catering, Leon's talent in cooking was quite amazing. They all ate quiet like they could sense something weird in the atmosphere. Merlin hadn't looked up from his plate and Arthur was fidgeting on his left side as the time came by and saw Merlin become more and more anxious. He wanted all to end already. Morgana would look at both of them trying to suppress her smirk and Leon, clearly on the scheme, would kick her hard under the table. The rest of them, Lancelot, Gwen, Freya and Percival where looking from Merlin to Gwaine as though Gwaine was about to start yelling at him again. They were quite uncomfortable since the last time on Gwen's birthday and no one had actually saw Merlin after that except Gwen who was now holding Lancelot's hand worried.

When they finished desert, Arthur thought that it was finally the time to do what he was supposed to in the first place. He stood up and raised his glass and said in the most formal voice he could master.

"Ok everyone. Perhaps you all wonder why you are all here today so I have an announcement to make. These past few months have been very special to me. Merlin, do you care to join me?"

Merlin reluctantly stood up next to him and took his hand. Arthur looked into his eyes reassuringly.

"Merlin and I are together for two months now and we wanted to share this with you, our friends".

Everyone kept quite as Morgana hugged both of them really proud for her brother that he had actually went through with it. Even Merlin managed to relax when Leon congratulated them laughing merrily and really amused with Arthur's self-content face.

"That's why you asked me here?" Gwaine finally spoke. " To see you being ridiculed? You could have saved yourself the trouble, I want nothing to do with any of this and I've already told you so".

"I asked you here because you were my friend too Gwaine". Merlin's voice was so sad that everyone turned to look at him.

"I **was** your friend, I don't want to be around you anymore. You should be ashamed! So what, you are dating him? And then what? You will live happily ever after? That's not right". He had grabbed Merlin from the collar and Arthur was becoming mad with anger.

" Get your hands of off him…NOW" and punched him right on his nose. Merlin stepped back and hid behind Arthur and as Gwaine was trying to hit him back, Leon and Lancelot had already grabbed him and threw him out of the house.

"You are no longer welcomed to this house" Morgana shouted at him as she closed the door behind him. Everyone rushed to Merlin's side who was holding back his tears, hidden in Arthur's embrace as he was whispering soothing words to him. Finally, Percival cleared his throat.

"Look Merlin, I have no problem at all with you being gay but Gwaine was my friend long before I met you. I just don't want to have to choose because it would always be him Merlin. I'm sorry".

"It's ok" Merlin managed, "I understand".

Percival and Freya left immediately after that probably trying to find Gwaine. Merlin felt miserable. Those people had been his friends for so long and now he was suddenly all alone. Well, not alone he thought as he glanced up at Arthur who was rubbing circles on his back. Lancelot approached him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Well, all I can see is that you make Arthur happy and maybe even less of a brat" he winked to Arthur. "I'm glad to finally getting to know you Merlin as all we have managed till now was a hello. And don't worry, I have your back".

Gwen hugged then both of them and said she was so happy for the two of them and Merlin felt grateful that he might have found some people who just accepted him although he couldn't call them friends yet. He managed to relax somehow but Arthur was sensing that he was still in distress so, after he excused themselves for having to cut the night shorter, he took him to his home.

Merlin collapsed in Arthur's bed and let the tears finally came down.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Arthur asked tentatively.

"No".

"Do you want to be alone for a while?"

"No, not really", and pulled the blond man down to him in a heated kiss.

His hands started to move quickly. He was touching Arthur everywhere he could find skin and tried to get rid of their clothes so hungrily that got Arthur worried.

"Merlin stop" he grabbed his hands and pushed him away. Merlin's face fell.

"You don't want me either".

Arthur sighed.

"Of course I want you. I've been doing nothing but wanting you this past three months we know each other. But not like this Merlin. No while you are frustrated and angry and obviously distressed. I want you and only you, when you are really ready".

Merlin was skeptical for a moment. Could he actually love him that much as to care about why it wasn't the right moment for them to have sex? He felt a huge amount of trust and love then that his face broke into a wide grin.

"Ok, maybe not tonight…But soon Arthur…I promise".

And with that, they fell asleep smiling with true completeness.


	6. Chapter 6

_Sorry it has taken me so long to update but here it comes._

_Reviews are always welcomed._

Merlin was thinking that, after another month of sulking over Gwaine, Percival and Freya, everything was getting better. Arthur's friends had already accept him into their small company and were being easygoing and normal around their relationship. Everytime that someone would see him in a bad mood, they'd do their best to cheer him up and take his mind of off thinking too much. What was even more surprising was that Merlin actually sought out their company when Arthur was on a trip with Uther concerning work, or when his boyfriend was just busy. And everyone welcomed his friendship, his big smile and his kind heart.

Morgana had surprised both her brother and Merlin when she announced that things with Leon was getting serious. She didn't actually say the word "love" but they could she how her smile grew when she was talking about him or being around him. They both thought that the man was quite brave to put up with all her moods, but again Morgana was like a puppy around him so maybe he didn't have to put up with a lot. Morgana's and Leon's relationship though wasn't the only one that had changed.

Merlin had started noticing different things about him when Arthur was too close. He was feeling the urge to grab him and kiss him until they were both senseless, and soon found that his whole body ached when the blond was away. He always felt protected when he was with him and Arthur had already proved that he deserved such trust after what happened with Gwaine. Finally, after three months of being together, Merlin realised that he was ready to give to Arthur all of him, and only hoped to be enough.

He had prepared a romantic night at his apartment. Candle's lighten, his favourite dinner cooked and jazz music coming from the radio. When Arthur came in though he seemed so exhausted that he just collapsed on an armchair. The younger boy was dissapointed at first but then thought of the hell that his boyfriend was going through with his father so he decided to calm him down first. He removed his shoes and silently stood behind him and started massaging his shoulders trying to relax him. Arthur just grabbed his wrists and pushed him into his lap.

"You don't have to do any of these Merlin, you are not my servant".

"No, but I want to. What happened?" Merlin's true concern was enough to make Arthur relax.

"Same old. You did all these?"The blond said when he took a look around for the first time he entered the house. Merlin just nodded.

"I'm sorry love. I was just so tired. Let's eat then shall we?" He started pulling the other boy up but Merlin just shrugged.

"It's ok if you don't want to. It is probably cold by now anyway".

But Arthur, taking note of his expression (and actually very amused with his sweetness) just sat on tha table and ate his whole plate without complaining. How could he? Merlin only wanted to take care of him in any way he could for the moment.

The young Pendragon was arguing with himself a lot lately and that was the main reason he appeared always so tired. He was sure that Merlin was the only one who he'd ever want in his life but all this hiding wasn't good for either of them. Their families didn't know anything yet, and when in public, even amongst their friends, they just acted as best mates instictively. He didn't know if Merlin had noticed that too, all he knew was that they didn't deserved it, that their relationship was nothing to be ashamed of. This boy was the purest thing in his life, so he managed to tell him the decision he was battling with for the last weeks.

"Merlin", he started as he was blowing of the candles one by one and Merlin was doing the dishes. "What do you think of us taking a trip?"

"Together?"

"Yeah, you know...As in vacations".

Merlin contemplated the idea for a while before he managed a huge grin. A couple of days alone with Arthur would be dreamy and maybe then he could get some rest and tell him of the other thing that he wanted to tell him anyway.

"Ok! What do you have in mind?" Arthur smiled with the eagerness in the other's voice.

"There is a place uptown, only a few hours from here with a wonderful beach. I used to spend much time there as a kid, I'm sure you'll love it".

"I'm sure I will! When are we leaving?"

"Why not tomorrow? My godfather will be so surprised!" At this last comment Merlin dropped the dish he was currently washing and managed to cut himself as he tried to pick up the pieces from the sink. Arthur was next to him in an instant when he let out a small cry.

"What happened?" He took his bloody hand into his own but the brunette pull it back abruptly, frowning.

"Godfather?I'm not sure that this is a very good idea. I thought we said we would take things slow concerning family".

"Gaius is more than a father to me actually" Arthur sighed, now in the bathroom bandaging Merlin's hand.

"He is kind and gentle and I know he is going to accept who I am. I trust him Merlin, I really do and I'd like it if you had a small faith in me. It's not like I'm willing to throw you out in the wolves after everything that has happened to you".

"I do Arthur, it's just that...I don't know..."

"Try?For me?Please?"

And who could really say no to a pouty Arthur Pendragon...

Everything was as Arthur promised. Gaius was a really nice old man, hiding his surprise behind a gentle smile upon seeing his godson entering his house holding another man's hand while waiting to be introduced to a girlfriend. Merlin couldn't help but smile at that. He was always kind towards both of them and seemed at ease seeing them together. He actually thanked Merlin for making Arthur so happy.

"You know, that boy has been under a lot of pressure since he was very small. Growing up with Uther was never easy, so thank you".

"You are not even a little bit shocked?" Merlin asked doubtfully.

"Of course I was! But then I saw him smile just by looking at you. And then I tried to remember when was the last time I saw him smile like that and then it hit me. I have never seen him smile before, not even as a child. That was enough for me my boy. Just be patient with him. I know that sometimes he can be too much to handle". The old man smirked as Merlin shook his head in amusement.

Two days had passed and Arhtur hadn't even tried to make a move on Merlin, so now the younger man was worried that his boyfriend was too afraid that he might break him or something. But when Arthur asked him to join him in a stroll at an isolated beach he decided that it was time to do something about it.

They had taken their shoes of and let the small waves brush gently to their feet. Merlin was giggling while Arhtur was holding his hand and whispering in his ear. Suddenly, the younger boy stopped and pulled the blond one around so they were face to face. Holding his breath anxiously he placed a chaste kiss on Arthur lips and he moaned at the sensation. Arthur was too happy to kiss him back and soon they were making out pretty heavy, both of them now collapsed in the golden sand. Arthur couldn't help it, he wanted Merlin more than anything and he was provoking him with every sound that was coming out of his mouth. He let his hands wonder around his slim waist and when Merlin shivered from his cold hands, he pulled back.

"I'm sorry Merlin...I just...You should have stopped me before I got carried away...It won't happen again, I promise". He was looking at his hands and so he missed Merlin's small smile playing on his lips as he pulled him closer once more.

"Make love to me Arthur".

Arthur's body stiffened when he heard those words, he wanted to so much but he hated the idea of hurting Merlin.

"Are you sure?"

"More than anything in my entire life. Just...be gentle with me".

"What do you mean? You have done this before haven't you Merlin?"

"Well...not really". Merlin was ashamed admitting that but Arthur's smile grew wider. _His _Merlin was a virgin. And he was his.

He started kissing him again while gently removing their clothes. When he finished this task he stood up, took Merlin's hands on his own and pulled him on his feet too. He caressed his cheek with his palm before starting placing small, tender kisses on his neck. Merlin pulled him closer, trying not to pass out from the lack of breathing. Every sense of his was aware only of Arthur, his mouth and his hands which were now caressing his slim arse. When Arthur bit his ear and then licked the reddened flesh he let a groan escape his mouth and felt the other man smiling against his skin. Arthur only paused for a moment to look him in the eyes.

"Do you trust me?"

"Always".

He pulled him forward then until their waists were covered with water and gently reached for his cock. Merlin thought if it would be too embarrassing if he came right there, but he didn't had much time to react when he felt Arthur's finger inside his hole. It was burning but he loved every single thing that Arthur was doing to him. Soon the finger was replaced by two and then three and Merlin was now in heaven. He could die from pleasure, the sensation was too much and he had now put his long lengs around Arthur's waist, his fingers pulling the golden hair hard. But Arthur didn't seem to mind. Only seeing Merlin coming undone by his fingers alone was enough to make his erection go even harder. He was desperate now but he had to take care of Merlin first.

"I'm going to make love to you now Merlin" he said when the pain became too much. The boy just nodded, not quite sure how his voice would come out. Arthur lined his cock with the other man's hole and gently, but oh so slowly, started lowering the brunette over him. Merlin let out a small cry that caused Arthur to pull back automatically.

"Just relax, It's going to be better soon, I promise". Merlin only nodded again as Arhtur tried one more time. He was so tight but his muscles soon started relaxing around Arthur who was now thrusting up carefully. The pace was killing him but he wanted this to be special for his lover, it was his first time after all and he wanted him to take any pleasure he could get. When Merlin started making little noises in the back of his throat, and giving open-mouthed, breathless kisses to every single spot of Arthur's skin he could reach, he knew he wouldn't last long. With one hand he grabbed Merlin's cock and started stroking him in time with his thrusts as he quickened the pace until Merlin cried in ecstacy. A couple thrusts after that and Arthur was coming inside him with a wave of agony rushing through his body. Without removing himself inside of Merlin, he secured his legs around his waist, and lifted him up, easing them both on the sand once again. Merlin hadn't quite recovered yet when Arthur decided to make him even more happy than he already was.

"I love you Merlin. And it couldn't have been any more perfect".

"I love you too. Just give a sec here, will you. I think I might faint".

Arthur laughed so hard as he pulled the small man in his hands.

"Come and stay with me?"

Marlin only stared at him and then nodded.

"Ok".

_Well?What do you think?_


	7. Chapter 7

_Thanks for the reviews! I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do._

Arthur was glaring at Morgana with his _stay-out- of- dark- corners- or- I- might- accidentally- kill- you _look. Everyone was in his apartment helping Merlin to move in, carrying boxes with clothes and books (he had already sold what little furniture he had from his old apartment, Arthur's was already fully equipped) while Morgana sat comfortably on his couch giving orders and opinions on decoration, reaching out to grab Leon's arse occasionally. Even Gwen who had a temper of a martyr had started getting annoyed and really tired. How many clothes did Merlin have anyway? Surely, most of them were scarves, he had already demonstrate enough of them with his every-day attire.

"Holly crap!" Lancelot cried out suddenly from the bedroom and everyone rushed inside fearing that he might have broken something.

"What the hell happened?" Leon finally asked perplexed when they realized that his friend just stood by the door staring at an empty corner. "You saw a giant spider or something?"

"Where is your desk?" Lancelot said to Arthur ignoring everyone else, including Leon's remark. They were all looking at him like he was crazy now, except Morgana of course who was just smirking clearly knowing something more than the rest of them.

"I moved it to the guest room", Arthur mumbled and gave him a pleading look, begging him to change the subject. Everyone else seemed to notice though and they got even more confused.

"What?" They said in unison and Lancelot and Morgana burst through laughter.

"Arthur had this very old desk", she explained after managing to control herself, "and didn't allow anyone to touch it or put something on it. He just had it in that corner, worshiping it, he wouldn't ever rest his own clothes on it. It was the reason he broke up with Vivian, you know".

"How?" Asked Gwen quite amused with the way Arthur was blushing, eyes casted on the floor.

"Poor girl tried to do something nice for him and started cleaning the place. When Arthur came home he noticed that it had been moved by a few inches and started yelling at her not to ever touch his things. The poor girl left crying, and she didn't speak to him ever since".

"And again, another time at his birthday", Lancelot cut through, "I was really drunk and I was making out with some girl in his room, that was long before I met you sweetie" he turned to Gwen who was giving him a _when-exactly-was-that-Lancelot-DuLac_ look. "Anyways, I had put a bottle of beer on it and when he accidentally interrupted us he started going mental. At first I thought that it was about me being with someone in his bed but then I noticed that he was staring wide-eyed and terrified at the desk". Lancelot didn't even bother to hide his grin.

"It is really old, ok?" Arthur scolded him.

"Yeah, right! So old that you didn't speak to me for two weeks after that. I had to apologize before you said something that was more than a growl to me! And even then, it was barely a _goodmorning_".

"It is really, REALLY, old".

"How old?" Leon asked with a look that said he had hang out with Morgana enough already.

"It was my great-grandfather's, from my mother's side. I don't have many things that belonged to her ok? It has sentimental value". Everyone gave him awws and pats on the shoulders.

" So why did you move it then?" Merlin finally asked confused when everyone looked at him in a way that said that he was the only one who hadn't got it yet.

"Well, with you moving in I thought we might need some more space. And I didn't know if you were going to bring anything else of yours…I just wanted you to feel like home for the first moment, like you always belonged here" he almost whispered the last phrase. Merlin, trying hard not to cry, buried himself in his chest.

"Thank you" he said and they started kissing, coming to a pause only when everyone around them started coughing.

When everyone left it was getting rather late. Both boys were so tired that they just collapsed to their now shared bed, keeping each other as close as they could.

_I never imagined that I would be so happy_, Merlin thought while stroking Arthur's blond hair. _I wish he knows how much I love him. That I would give everything to him. He made me trust him so fast, he made me want him so fast. I'm so scared. I think that I'm not going to survive if we would ever be apart. It's like without him I can't breathe. And it's safe, because I know that he will never take advantage of that._

In the meanwhile, Arthur was dreaming of an older version of themselves, in his father's garden, with children around them and Merlin smiling at him, holding his hand.

Two months had passed in a happy haze for Arthur and Merlin. Merlin had managed to switch his shifts on the bookstore he worked so that now he was only working mornings. That way he could be home in the afternoons, around the time Arthur was returning from the office. After that hour, the whole world was becoming blurry as they were losing themselves in their love.

"I want to tell you something but promise me that you will not get mad at me" Merlin whispered in Arthur's ear after a night spent having sex on every free surface of their apartment. Arthur looked at him post-coitally.

"How could I ever be mad at you after that?" Merlin just snuggled closer, his face still serious.

"I want to visit my mother"

"Ok. Just tell me when you want to go and I'll take the day off".

"No. I meant alone". Arthur looked at him with a hurt look and Merlin's heart broke into pieces.

"You don't want her to know about us? About me?"

"No! It's not that!"

"Then what is it? She knows that you are gay for four years now! You told me that yourself!" Arthur was struggling to keep his voice down.

"It's just…Forget about it" Merlin said after some consideration and turned his back on him. The blond was now regretting his tone.

"I'm sorry love. I just don't understand. Talk to me" He brought him closer so that his back was against his chest. Merlin sighed and turned around to face him again.

"When I told her I was gay she just thought that it was because I didn't have enough experience with girls, because I was young, teenager. She never took it seriously and I never again discussed it with her because I felt that she wouldn't understand. Going from that, to telling her that I'm in an actual relationship with a man would be too much and I'd like to do it alone first. I want her to be a part of this, of us but I need some time to talk her through this first. Seeing you there would give her a stroke" He tried to joke but Arthur only smiled at him gently, cupping his cheek with his palm, giving him a gentle kiss.

"If this is what you want then this is what is going to happen. Just know that I will be here no matter what, and ready to meet her when you feel like it".

Merlin gave him a peck on the nose and they both finally slept, optimistic yet again.

Arthur had almost opened a hole on the floor, pacing while waiting for Merlin. He had finally gone to visit his mother, a week after their discussion and he was really anxious. Merlin loved her very much and he was scared to death of what might come after their conversation.

He rushed to the door and pull it open when he heard Merlin outside fidgeting with his keys.

"Finally" he said but forced to stop abruptly when he saw tears coming down the pale man's eyes. Without asking anything he pulled him into a deep hug.

"I'm so sorry baby. I'm so sorry. Shhh"

"I really thought that she would understand" Merlin chocked.

"What did she say?"

"That she needs time to think about it, and don't try to get in contact with her before she does and that it is very weird and that she never thought I would grow up to be one of them. You should have seen her face. She was disgusted". He was now sobbing and Arthur's every gentle touch only seemed to make him cry harder like he didn't deserve it.

"It's going to be ok, I promise. I will never leave you, you will always have me no matter what. We will figure things out, I promise".

"Promise?"

"Promise". And Merlin finally managed to calm with Arthur holding him tight, rocking him back and forth like a kid who had just lost his parents.

_AN: There is going to be a very sentimental scene with Hunith soon. Hope you liked this chapter. Let me know!_


	8. Chapter 8

_Thank you all for the reviews and alerts and favorites!_

…

Merlin wasn't holding up very well and Arthur could tell what was going on in his mind better than in his own. He tried so hard to be cheerful in front of him, because the blond man had given already so much to their relationship but everyone could see past that. He was in pain, and no matter what Arthur did to make it all better and make him forget, his smile just couldn't reach his eyes. They all understood that he was missing his mother and Arthur himself dreaded the day that he had to announce to his father that he was with Merlin. And Uther was no Hunith. If she had reacted that bad, then he didn't even want to think about that day. Even Morgana feared of what was to come. Yet Merlin was always glad that Arthur was with him and he never took it out on him and their love. He was still kind, gentle and good-hearted, only a little bit sadder.

It had been two months and still no word from Merlin's mother, and he was getting more and more depressed. She was his only family with his father gone before he was even born, no brothers or sisters no uncles no nothing. So Arthur decided that it was time to take matters in his own hands. Besides, things couldn't get any worse for his partner.

When Hunith opened her front door that morning, a young blond man greeted her with a smile.

"Hello, Mrs. Emrys. My name is Arthur Pendragon and I'm in a relationship with your son". He thought that he should be straight forward with this but she just froze.

"May I come in? It will only take a few minutes". She nodded and he passed through her sitting himself on an armchair in her small living room.

"I don't know what you are doing here. I've already said to Merlin that…Unless something has happened?" She sounded genuinely concerned.

"Nothing, he's fine…physically...I just wanted to talk to you" he reassured her.

"I guess that you won't take no for an answer so I'm listening".

"The truth is that Merlin hasn't been very well emotionally since he spoke to you. He is always depressed and has lost some weight. No matter what I do he doesn't snap out of it. He has already lost his friends Mrs. Emrys, and he really loves you. He doesn't deserve this, he has the kindest soul".

"You sound really in love with him".

"I am. He is my whole life and I just want to see him happy again. All I ever wanted was to take care of him. Please…just…talk to him. Let him now at least that you don't hate him, that you are not disgusted by him".

"Of course I'm not!"

"He doesn't know that. And with all due respect, you not talking to him doesn't really help his situation".

"Is he really that bad?"

"Yes. Look, he doesn't know that I'm here and I'm not going to tell him. I don't want to put you in any awkward position. The decision is still yours; I just thought that you should know how much that costs him". And with that he left.

….

When he returned to their apartment he found Merlin rushing to the door with a huge grin on his face. He nearly bumped into him while trying to open the door but the brunette was so caught up trying to put on his jacket while walking that he didn't even notice him until Arthur grasped his arm.

"Hey", he finally said, "you will never guess what happened!"

"Well, whatever put that smile on your face is good enough for me". Merlin only pulled him closer and rested his head in his chest.

"You always say these things to me…"

Arthur smirked with the tremble in his voice. He liked the idea that Merlin was mantling with small gestures like that.

"I love you too but what happened?"

"My mom called, she wants to meet and talk!"

"Did she?"

"Isn't this great?"

"Yeah! Did she say anything else?"

"Like what?" Merlin frowned.

"I don't know…What she wants to talk about maybe? Or why now?" He wasn't sure that Hunith hadn't just called him to reprimand him for his visit.

"No but…You thing that she is going to turn me down forever?" the younger man looked really worried now and Arthur gave him a tentative peck on the lips.

"Of course not! Who could ever drive you away anyways? I'm sure she only missed you and that she realized her mistake. Everything is going to be fine, you will see".

"Baby, thank you for everything…Really…I know that I've been rather grumpy lately…"

"That's an understatement!"

"…but don't you think that I don't understand what I've put you through".

"Well, having Morgana accusing me that I did something wrong at first, before you explained, wasn't very nice. You owe me for that one".

"I owe you for everything". They started kissing and soon it became heated until finally Arthur found the strength to pull away.

"Although I would so much like to finish this conversation Merlin, we are never going to find out what she wants unless you hurry" he pussed him to the door's direction with a smack on his ass.

"Arthur!" Merlin's face became as red as a tomato as he was running to the exit.

…

Arthur was getting really nervous. It was 23:00 and still no sign of Merlin. What if his mother casted him away and now he was wandering around the city alone and scared? What if he had managed to make things worse and Hunith didn't appreciate at all his efforts? He would never forgive his self if that was the case. The TV only managed to lull him so when his lover returned a couple of minutes after midnight he found him fast asleep on the couch.

Merlin, stroke his forehead as he carefully removed a stray of blond hair from his eyes. Arthur was so peaceful that he didn't want to disturb him, but he stirred awake with this little touch, too aware to Merlin's presence always. He noticed that he was crying.

_Shit! _he thought.

He reached out to him and made him lay next to him on the couch, wrapping his arms around him.

"What happened love? Did she…?"

"She said that she missed me very much and that she decided to accept us" Merlin interrupted.

"That's a good thing, right?"

"Yes".

"Why are you crying then?"

"She told me what you did…Arthur I…" Merlin swallowed a lump in his throat. He had planned this whole conversation but seeing the love in Arthur's eyes he couldn't help but want to cry even more. To lay beside him and never let go.

"Shhh…You know that I would do anything to see you happy. When I said that you mean the world to me Merlin I really meant it. I love you so much!"

"You have no idea what that means to me…How am I ever going to pay you back for being you?"

"You can start by making a promise to me".

"Anything".

"Ok two promises". Arthur chuckled but Merlin just nodded taking this very seriously. He was going to be the better thing that happened to Arthur… He promised his self that he will always look after him.

"Well, first of all promise me that this smile will always be on your face. That you will talk to me whenever there is something wrong so we can work it out together. Don't shut me out again. I understand that you didn't want me to worry about you but it was more painful seeing you like this and not talking".

"I promise that I'll do my best. After all, you always seem to know what's going on before I do". Merlin snorted. "I can't believe you let me worry about what she wanted to say to me earlier".

"I swear that I didn't know. She didn't say anything to me when I left her house and I just didn't want you to get your hopes up".

"Fine, I choose to believe you".

"Ok, I accept that for now".

"And second?"

"Promise that you will never leave me", Arthur turned serious all of a sudden.

"I can guarantee you that Arthur Pendragon. I'm going to stay with you as long as you want me to. Besides my mom would kill me if I ever leave you now…She liked you very much! She warned me not to hurt you. And I'm not going to".

"I'm glad to hear that, I'm going to hold you to your word just so you know…Well, I liked her too".

"Can I kiss you now?"

"Only if you take your shirt off. I missed that scrawny body of yours" he had already started removing it, brushing his fingers against the pale man's torso. Merlin whimpered.

"I missed you so much. I'm sorry".

"Shhh".

"Arthur?"

"Yes?"

"I love you to, prat".

"Your prat?"

"Always".

They made love that night and it was slow, romantic but not less wanting. Arthur felt like Merlin was giving him his whole soul and he took it without a second thought.


	9. Chapter 9

_Thank you all for reading this. And again, I don't own anything!_

…

"Next Saturday, my place, my birthday party" Morgana announced entering Arthur's office. He rolled his eyes, not taking the interruption very kindly.

"I already know that is your birthday Morgana! You don't have to remind me. Could you be more self-conscious?"

"Good for you, but I'm not here for that dear brother". She was ready for a fight and Arthur didn't have the time for that.

"What then? You need any form of advice on clothing?" he smirked but she didn't smile her usual ironic grin.

"Should we tell Merlin? Do you want him there?" she searched his eyes for any kind of distress but found only confusion.

"Why the hell not?"

"I'm serious Arthur. I don't know what to do, it's totally up to you".

" I have no idea what are you talking about".

"Uther!" she exclaimed, frustrated with his lack of any kind of reaction. And only then it dawned to him. His father was going to be there. He had already met everyone else of their friends except Merlin. Naturally, he would ask about him and what could he possibly say? That they were partners? His father would eat him alive or, worse, would accuse Merlin for dishonoring him or something. He loved the other man very much but he wasn't ready to take that step with Uther yet. If he had anyone else for a father then he wouldn't hesitate a second but things were always difficult with Uther Pendragon. At least if his mother was alive she could calm him down enough to listen.

"Fuck! What am I going to do?" He snapped, ruffling his blond hair with his hand unconsciously.

"Talk to Merlin maybe? I'm sure he will understand how you feel". She straightened his hair back into place.

"Yes, he will. But he will also get hurt. You know how he keeps everything to himself, you know him better than me".

"Yeah you're right. So what then?"

"We won't tell him anything. I won't come either". Morgana tried to protest but stopped when she saw the look on his face. She hadn't seen him like that since his mother died when he was seven.

"I promise I will make it up to you Morgs. I just…"

"It's ok…I understand. I'm proud for you, I really am. Someday Uther will see this too. Merlin is very lucky".

She gave him a kiss on his cheek and left.

…

A week later, Merlin and Arthur were entering Morgana's apartment holding a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates. As it turned out, Uther had to travel to the US for some business merger, so the younger boy didn't have to be lied to or take part in any of Arthur's and Morgana's anxiousness. He didn't even had time to suspect that something was wrong as Uther's departure became known to the other two right after their conversation.

Leon greeted them on the door and rushed them in to join the others. The place was overheated and overcrowded for Merlin's likings. The boys were laughing and dancing around without caring of what anyone would say. They felt free.

Everyone started singing "Happy Birthday" and Morgana was clapping her hands like a (drunk) five years old when a man called from the front door.

"Are you going to cut the cake without me?"

The atmosphere just froze as Uther entered the apartment.

"Surprise!" he forced a smile. "I came back a day earlier; I hope I'm still welcomed here". Morgana was the first to come to her senses.

"Of course father, welcome!" she gave him a hug and took her present from his hands. Everyone unfroze then and greeted him formally before disappearing back into drinking and dancing. Arthur only nodded and shook his hand and his father didn't make any attempt for further salutation.

Merlin was feeling trapped watching Arthur and Morgana staring at him nervously. He didn't need to be that smart to realize that he and Uther in the same room was the cause of distress. Arthur walked to him and suggested for them to leave because he was tired but he didn't have the chance to answer before Uther came to them with Morgana by his side looking at Arthur concerned. He swallowed hard, leaving Merlin's hand immediately and, turning to them he took a step forward, as far away from Merlin as it would not look suspicious.

"Well Morgana, won't you introduce me to your friend. I haven't met him before, have I?"Uther gave the young boy a scrutinizing look, clearly not approving his daughter's company.

"He is Merlin, an old friend of hers" Arthur spoke first. " He stays in my spare room for his short visit in town since Leon moved in with Morgana".

"Of course he is".

The old Pendragon didn't make any more inquires but the damage was already done to Merlin's heart although he didn't say anything. But Arthur always noticed these kind of things.

"I'm sorry baby, I wasn't ready for him yet".

"You could at least say that I was YOUR friend. Are you so embarrassed even for that?" He didn't wait for the blonde's reply; he only said his goodbyes and left before his tears could come down.

…

When Arthur returned home not an hour later he found Merlin curled on the bed, still sobbing.

"I understand that you are upset, but I really am proud for us. I just froze ok? I said the first thing that came to my mind".

"Strange what that was though".

"What do you want me to do to make things alright again? I swear I'll tell him, I just need some time. It has nothing to do with you. It's about my already strained relationship with him and the fact that he is always disappointed no matter what I do. I love you, and that will not change".

Merlin turned to him and saw the distress and the remorse in his eyes. He snuggled closer to him and sighed, a heated breath across his neck calming Arthur down.

"It's ok, I understand. I'm sorry for causing a scene, I just panicked when I heard you saying those things. You can tell him whenever you want, I'm not going to pressure you to do this".

Arthur stayed silent. He truly appreciated what Merlin had said, and with each passing second he became even more sure for his love for the man. He couldn't help but wonder what good had he done to deserve him. He couldn't let go, and despite his insecurities, he knew that Merlin was the best thing that has happened in his life. So why was he so afraid? He was his own man; his father shouldn't be able to haunt him in his most beautiful moments.

He stared at Merlin, now asleep in his lap and was amazed with how beautiful and peaceful he looked after everything. He had truly forgiven him. Trying not to wake him, he carefully disentangled himself and stood up. He brushed gently his lovers raven hair, letting his hand linger more than necessary and whispered:

"I'm going to make you happy, you deserve to be happy. I will prove to you that I'm proud to be by your side".

And with that he left.

…

Half an hour later, Uther Pendragon was glaring at his son in the front door of the Pendragon mansion.

"Arthur, what's wrong? Do you know what time is it?"

" Merlin is my partner. I'm in love with him and we are together for some time now. I needed you to know", the boy breathed out and he felt more relieved than he had in ages. He returned home and buried himself in his lover's sleepy embrace who hadn't even notice that he had gone.

"I love you" The brunette murmured.

"I love you too Merlin…I love you too". He smiled and allowed himself to get mushy and lost in his smell.


	10. Chapter 10

_I hope you all enjoyed the last chapter. _

_And here comes the angst…_

…

Next Monday was Merlin's day of. When he woke up around midday he didn't expect Arthur lying on the couch instead of going to work and facing the consequences of his actions; facing his father, who hadn't made any contact during the weekend after Morgana's birthday.

"What are you doing here?" he said sleepily. Arthur, instead of answering held out a piece of paper to him. Merlin read it quietly.

"I don't understand…How…?"

"It's quite simple Merlin. My father threw me out of my office, fired me actually. And I have an official paper claiming just that, with his signature and seal and everything".

"But…He didn't say anything?"

"Oh, yes…He said that I wasn't a son of his, that if my mother was alive she would disown me and that he didn't wish to see me again or hear about me. Any more questions?"

Merlin didn't know what to say. That was too much, even for Uther.

"I'm so sorry Arthur. He will come to his senses, you will see. Did you speak with Morgana?"

"She tried to reason with him but he wouldn't listen. The whole company heard our voices though".

Merlin sat next to him and stroke his smooth hair.

"What can I do? Is there anything you need?"

"No, you've done enough already", his tongue was bitter.

"Don't be like that", Merlin pleaded but the blond man didn't reply. He wasn't a quitter though.

"I will make something nice for us to eat and then we could go for a walk, ok? You will feel better with your stomach full. Or maybe I could prepare a bath for you and then you should get some sleep. You look like you need it". Arthur still didn't utter a word. He stood up, grabbed his keys and left, closing the door behind him with a loud thump.

…

'_Arthur, I understand you need some time alone but call me ok?'_

'_Baby it's been hours…I'm worried'._

'_Come home…Please…'_

'_Just text me and let me know you are ok, please! Don't be a brat'_

It was almost midnight and Merlin was going frantic, leaving one voice message after another to Arthur's phone and still no answer. Finally Morgana called him, informing him that her brother would stay at her place for the night and not to wait up for him. She tried to sound reassuring but Merlin could hear that she was also worried about him, her voice rough with emotion. He thanked her for thinking about calling him (as he was sure that it wasn't Arthur's initiative) and tried to get some, much needed, sleep.

Things got worse after that. It wasn't like Arthur didn't have money, he had worked his whole life and had his own bank accounts along with what his mother had left him. He could support his grandchildren financially and he hadn't even turned thirty. It was his father's behavior that tore him apart. He had worked really hard for everything, even for Uther's love and he wasn't at all used to just sitting around waiting for Merlin to be back from work. And he didn't appreciate him petting him too.

So as the weeks passed, he was getting home even more late at night, most of the time drunk and always accusing Merlin about everything that went wrong in his life. Merlin would rush to his side, aid him in any way he could, sober him up and put him to bed, not allowing everyone to see how Arthur's words stung into his heart and soul. Every time he would try to reason with him but the older man's ego was getting in the way. And one night, after three months in hell, the storm blew up and washed away everything they had struggle to build together.

"I don't know what more to do Arthur; you need to snap out of it and get your life back".

"This coming from the man that was sulking over his mother for ages before I went and humiliate myself".

"Is this what you need me to do then? Try to reason with your father?"

"Gods no! Stay away from him, you could only be more damage!"

"At least I didn't take it out on you", Merlin was now yelling.

" We've still got us…Please…Let me help you", he lowered his voice in a desperate attempt to pull the other man away from the shadows and back to his arms

"And what could I possibly do with you _Merlin_? You have destroyed my entire life! I'm nothing without my job I don't have a place where I belong".

"You belong with me".

And Arthur laughed really hard.

"Great! I have my bonus then. I should be all domestic now…Waiting for you, cooking, doing the laundry until you come home. And then, give you a quick fuck and everything will be ok, right? I could get used to feeling miserable. YOU make me feel miserable".

"Don't say that", Merlin whispered.

"Is that what you want? Is that why you've been so cranky?" he had come uncomfortably close, grabbing Merlin by his neck.

"Don't do this, please".

"You want me to shag you, is that it?" He started groping him. Merlin tried to shove him away but Arthur was too drunk to be reasoned with. He finally managed to push him away and back into the couch but it was too late; he was already a broken man, crying his heart out.

"I love you with all my heart…And that's why I'm not going to sit around looking at you being destroyed. I'm leaving, before you make me hate you". He threw his scarce clothes into a backpack and left, feeling like his heart was being torn out of his chest. He hesitated before stepping out, part of him wishing that his lover would stop him, that he would say that he was sorry, pull him into his arms and make everything better. The other part though was screaming at him that it was time for Arthur to learn a lesson. But nothing happened. Arthur had collapsed on the couch, not even looking at him as if he didn't care. Merlin left then, and Arthur was fast asleep.

…

When he woke up two hours later he was much more sober.

"Merlin!" He yelled stumbling to his feet but collapsed outside of the bathroom door when memories of that night started bombing his brain.

_Oh no, no, no, no…_He was now panicking. _What have I done? I'm so stupid…Please, god no_.

He tried calling him but Merlin didn't pick up. Instead he sent him a text, repeating his last phrase to him as he wasn't sure that Arthur had heard him.

"I love you…I love you so much that hurts and that's why I had to let you go. Go back to your father, apologize, tell him that it was a stupid mistake and take your job back as you seem lost without it. I guess I wasn't enough…I'm so sorry for any damage I caused to your life. Please don't call me again…Leave what small piece of my heart is left in peace. Good luck…"

After that he wasn't able to leave to the same apartment anymore, being a guest of Morgana's instead. He was glad that both she and Leon were being supportive but he knew he had become a burden. His place was strangely empty without Merlin there. The shock of losing him was enough to quit drinking as he couldn't trust himself anymore. Sometimes he considered talking to his father but he didn't dare to. Merlin didn't deserve this. If he did this he would lose him forever. Merlin was right, it wasn't his fault. Uther was the bastard who had destroyed their lives, not their love. How could he do this to Merlin? How could he treat him like rubbish? He had to get him back even if he had to beg.

And beg he did…So hard…For so long…But when finally Merlin threw him out of his mother's house he knew he had lost.

…

"Father? It's Morgana..I'm in the hospital…Hurry!"

Uther was standing next to Arthur's hospital bed with Morgana by his side staring at her sleeping brother, crying.

"They say he lost control of his car and crashed into a tree. He hasn't wake up since and they fear that he may have sustain a brain damage". She informed him keeping her voice calm and yet so cold.

He didn't make a sound.

"He had gone to see Merlin…I guess it didn't go very well". She didn't need to guess that their father had already been informed about the break-up. Uther looked at his son's face, not showing any kind of emotion. Quietly, he stood up and left.

"You have destroyed your son's life! At least you could show some remorse!" she yelled to his retreating back.

….

_**So? Let me know what you think!**_


	11. Chapter 11

_So do you want the angst to go on for a while or start making everyone happy again? Let me know! And thank you all for the favorites, alerts, reviews etc...They mean a lot!_

…

Since he threw Arthur out of his mom's place, Merlin had a very bad feeling on which he couldn't really put his finger. He sensed that something was wrong with Arthur but couldn't just give him a call and ask him, could he? So he compromised with the next best thing; his friend who had really missed during this whole period of inner turmoil.

"Morgana? Hey what's up? It's been a while?"

"Oh Merlin! I'm so glad you called!" He knew right there that his instinct was right. "I didn't know if Arthur would like me to tell you or if you wanted to be dragged into this but…"

"What happened?"

"It's Arthur…He had an accident…"

Merlin was in the hospital within the hour. Morgana and Leon were already there waiting for him but no sign from Uther since the day of the accident.

"This is my entire fault! If I hadn't…" A sob stopped his words and Morgana was immediately by his side.

"No honey…He was upset for quite some time now…He made a mess out of his life, it is not your fault".

"He was always there for me and I left him when he needed me most. I caused this and don't try to make me feel better".

"He pushed you away, Merlin. He needed to collect himself first before he even tried to win you back". Leon was pleading with him, trying desperately to calm him down with no success.

"He never really lost me…"

"You were the most beautiful thing that happened in his life. If someone is to put to blame, that is Uther alone", Morgana chimed in.

"Don't talk like his gone, please…If anything happens to him I'll just die. I love him so much, I've been so stupid", Merlin started sobbing again on Arthur's still hand, holding it up on his cheek.

"He loves you too, sweetie. Whatever happens, never forget that".

…

A month has passed and Arthur was still comatose, with Merlin never leaving his side. Until the day came that everyone dreaded but never anyone ever spoke of.

"There is no easy way to tell you this, but I think that the time has come to let Arthur go" the doctor told them so coldly, so professionally, that morning. Like it wasn't a human life he was talking about. Like no one cared… Morgana and Leon were thinking about it for some time now, but it never had crossed Merlin's mind. He always thought that his love would wake up, no matter how much time it took him. He pleaded with them, asking them to give him some more time, but they all told them that it was in vain. He couldn't say goodbye, not without letting Arthur know how much he loved him, how he broke his heart but how in the end it never mattered because he would always come to him in the end. It was the most difficult decision Morgana had to take in her life, and she didn't even for once considered to call their father. He had made clear that he didn't want to be a part of their lives any more. He didn't even once called her to ask about her brother, let alone visit. She had to do this alone and she was afraid that she would make the wrong decision. But when she finally made the choice, they all knew that it was definitive.

Merlin couldn't stop crying. No matter how much everyone tried to separate him from Arthur even for a while, he just never listened. If those were the final days he would spend with him he wanted to look at his face, memorize it, as much as he could. Even Gwen had offered to take him at her home for a night or two just to rest, promising that Arthur would still be there in the morning, but he refused. The doctors had to actually anesthetize him in order to get him to get some sleep, but even then they didn't dare to move him very far, setting a second bed in Arthur's room instead, Morgana's request. But time is merciless, and the morning that Merlin had to say his goodbyes finally came.

Everyone came out crying from the room and he knew that it was now his turn. He entered alone and gently lay beside Arthur, baring his forehead in the crook of his neck, grasping his hands in his, and started speaking his heart out.

"Remember when we first met? When I spilled that coffee on your shirt? At first, when you turned and looked at me I thought _Oh my God! I'm going to spend the rest of my life with this man_ and I was actually speechless for a few seconds. But then you started talking and I thought _ok, he is breathtaking but could he be more arrogant?_ But I got really worried when you asked the security to throw me out and all I could think was _look how cute he looks when he wrinkles his nose, and his brow furrows._ And then I saw you the second time with Morgana and I had to put all my strength not to kiss you in the middle of that small café. You have no idea how much I love you. How much I appreciated the fact that you were willing to wait for me, to protect me in any way you could, from Gwaine, from anybody. I'm sorry that I didn't do the same, that I left your father come between us (although admittedly that was a bit of your fault too). I'm sorry that I didn't have the strength to keep your head above the water. You have no idea how much it hurt to see you loosing yourself every passing day and not being able to do nothing to help you. Why didn't you let me help you? Why always so stubborn? I had to leave; you can't possibly understand how much I needed to leave. But even then, I never stopped loving you. The only thing I wanted was to give us both some time, for you to put your head together and realize if you loved me enough and for me to test how much I'd missed you. What I discovered scared me so much. It was only hours after, that the pain started to getting physical. I couldn't even breathe…And then you showed up in my mother's place, and I was so happy, but then after a while you started being a brat again, saying something about me not understanding and I was so mad. And I knew that you needed more time for this to work. I'm so sorry baby…I'm so sorry for that. If I had another chance I would fall in your arms without a second thought. Hell I wouldn't have ever left in the first place; I would have let you take me right there even if that would kill me inside. I will never love another…And I want you to know that I don't regret a second from us". He had cried his self out, so that in these last words he didn't had any more tears to shed.

"I don't regret it either", he heard a hoarse voice above him. He looked up, and there was Arthur, looking at him with such affection that he didn't even think to call for the doctors for a while. When he started coughing though, he woke up from his stupor and rushed to the door screaming. Morgana and the others couldn't understand what he was saying between his shouts so he grabbed her from her sleeve and pulled her to the room. Everyone followed and was shocked when they saw blue eyes blinking at them confusedly. The first to collect himself was Leon, who asked a nurse to call for the doctor.

…

"It is a miracle. I've never seen anyone to recover from such a head wound. You are a lucky man Mr Pendragon" the doctor said before leaving, after he subjected Arthur to every medical exam possible. He seemed to respond well.

Merlin was still holding his hand tight, like he was afraid that if he let g,o Arthur would fall asleep again.

"I could hear your voice", the blond man said after a while "and I tried to follow it. I could feel that you were saying goodbye and I wanted to scream to you don't leave me. But I couldn't…And then there was a light, and I followed it and it brought me to you. I'm so sorry Merlin…"

Everyone had started crying by this time, even Lancelot. No one had Arthur capable of loving someone so much and everyone wished that their other half would feel at least one small amount of the love that these men felt for one another. Morgana was sobbing on Leon's shoulder, turning off her phone, trying to avoid Uther's calls. He should had heard the news but she didn't care anymore. Her only family was her brother and she was going to make sure that he wasn't going to get hurt again by him. He didn't deserve a son like Arthur. The loving, caring and fragile Arthur she had come to know.

"Shhh" Merlin chocked. "Everything is going to be ok, baby…I will take you home soon and I'll never leave you again…I'm going to take care of you…I promise".

"Promise?"

"Promise".

…A.N.

It was really touch and go for a while but I hope you enjoyed it. Let me know…


	12. Chapter 12

_Thanks for the hits everyone but I would appreciate some feedback. It makes me get better._

…

Almost three weeks later Arthur was released from the hospital under Morgana's and Merlin's care and only because he insisted. Emotionally though he wasn't doing very well and so Merlin along with Lancelot and Leon, helped him to move back into Arthur's apartment like he had never gone in the first place. And then, finally, he took him home.

The first couple of nights were eventful. Arthur would wake up in the middle of the night to pull a sleeping Merlin next to him even closer, to smooth his hair and whisper soothing words to his ears (more meant to sooth him rather than Merlin). He was seeking for any contact he could get during those dark, endless hours. Merlin would wake some of the times, only to hug him back and reassure him that he was still there and that he wasn't going to leave. One particular night however, he woke up to an empty bed, and his lover was nowhere to be seen. He started looking around the room, thinking that Morgana would kill him if something happened but before having any time to actually panic, he found a crying Arthur in the leaving room, staring at the closed front door. Without saying anything, he kneeled next to him and held him tight, letting his tears sprinkle his bare chest. When Arthur finally managed to calm himself, Merlin gently turned his head so that the blond man would meet his eyes.

"Let's get out of here, ok?"Arthur only nodded in response. Merlin packed a few things and at 3.00 in the morning they found themselves knocking on Morgana's door.

…

Arthur was asleep till after midday, his exhaustion finally catching up with him after so many sleepless nights.

"Finally, he is sleeping like a baby" Merlin was relieved the next morning in Morgana's living room. "Sorry for showing up so late but I didn't know what else to do. I figured that a hotel room wouldn't help also".

"Don't be silly Merlin, you both are always welcomed here no matter what. I wouldn't let my brother who just got out from the hospital stay in a hotel, would I…Neither you as a matter of fact?"

"Yeah Morgs, I know…Thanks…"

"So…Care to tell me what happened?"

Merlin sighed.

"He wasn't sleeping well after we returned to the apartment. He would wake up in the middle of the night and never getting back to sleep, until last night I found him crying. He is not doing very well mentally; he still hasn't got past the fact that your father not only disinherited him but he didn't even visit. And the few hours he managed to sleep, he was murmuring about me leaving again. I thought that his place held too many memories and that he needed to get out till he gets through all of these…Clear his mind".

"You were right Merlin, and thank you for bringing him here. You know I will help in any way I can. And Leon too", she smiled.

" I know but still…You were the temporary solution…I was thinking of taking him on vacation but I still haven't figured out were". They both fell silent for a few seconds, thinking.

"What about Gaius?" Morgana exclaimed. "He would be glad to have you over for as much as you like…He really loves Arthur".

"You are right! How come I didn't think of it?"

"Really, honey? You want me to answer this?"

"You know, you can still get pretty bitchy when Leon isn't around" They both smirked.

"Anyways", Merlin said "do you think that you can contact Gaius somehow and ask him?"

"Sure thing".

Gaius of course didn't have any problem to have them both in, and he wouldn't even let them leave before he was sure that Arthur was back to his old self. So the day after, they were travelling towards that familiar beach which held so many beautiful memories.

…

Before reaching Gaius's house, Merlin decided that there was something he needed to do first. So he took Arthur down at the beach and they both sat down on the sand, not talking; just enjoying the whispers of the waves while they were crushing in the shore. Merlin had his head in Arthur's shoulder, and the older boy had entwined their fingers.

"I love this place", Arthur finally spoke.

"Mmm me too" Merlin murmured glad to hearing his partner's voice unstrained after so much time. His idea was very good after all…Well, Morgana's idea to be honest.

"Here we made love for the first time. You gave yourself to me…so trusting; I always wanted to prove myself worthy of that trust".

"And you have, Arthur…Being with you is the most important thing to me. I couldn't survive without you. We just had a bad moment…Everybody does….But now it's over, and we are together and none of that matter".

"I hurt you….So it matters to me".

"Do you love me?"

"How can you even ask me this Merlin? I love you with all my heart and I want you to be happy".

"I am happy. The only thing that upsets me is seeing you like this. So if you really love me you will put all these behind us, as I already have. We deserve that…I'm not going anywhere Arthur".

"Well, neither am I…Physically or emotionally…I will be the man you loved again…For you Merlin…Always for you".

"Good…I'll hold you to that".

…

When they reached Gaius's house, it wasn't the old man who greeted them on the door.

"Freya!" Merlin shouted "what are you doing here?"

Freya was speechless. Gaius hadn't told her that he was expecting any more guests for the time she was visiting.

"Arthur? Merlin? Gaius is my uncle…I'm visiting him with Percival for a couple of days. What are you doing here?"

"Gaius never spoke of a niece before. He's my godfather" Arthur said looking at Merlin from the corner of his eyes. The young man seemed to had lost his voice upon seeing his old friend. Gaius showed up then from behind Freya, Percival on his six.

"Ah! lads! You are finally here…I had started getting worried. This is…" Gaius tried to introduce the company.

"We already know each other" Merlin finally said, not lifting his eyes to look at Percival or Freya. Gaius sensed that something odd was going on.

"Is everything the matter?"

Arthur was ready to say goodbye and grab Merlin's hands and pull him away but Merlin knew that Arthur needed to be there, so he spoke first.

"Everything is fine…We were just surprised to see each other here" he forced a smile.

Gaius ushered them in and showed them to their room before making a nice dinner. The two couples tried to make some polite conversation with him, though no one attempted to speak directly at the other. Arthur was rubbing Merlin's thigh reassuringly under the table and the young man was relaxed enough by that small gesture that he managed to smile at him with all his heart. Arthur's heart melted at this. When Gaius however decided to go to sleep, the four of them fell silent, looking uneasily to the floor. Finally Percival looked at Freya who nodded at him so he started talking, addressing mainly to Merlin.

"Look, Merlin. We are so sorry about Gwaine".

"It was not your fault" Merlin managed.

"No, I meant…For choosing him…It turned out he didn't deserved it".

"What happened?" Arthur asked curiously. It was Freya who answered.

"He saw my sister kissing another woman so he just saw fit to…hit her in the middle of the street. I wasn't expecting that. He got arrested but my sister didn't press any charges so he was released. We never had a problem with you being gay, it was mostly the fact that we were more friends with him than you, you know?"

Merlin nodded.

"And all this time we were trying to make him call you, we thought he was missing you or something but he was so stubborn to admit it" Percival chimed in. "We were completely wrong. He is just a cockalorum. We are so sorry Merlin, truly sorry".

"And we, at least, really missed you".

Merlin smiled relieved.

"It's ok, really. You didn't do anything wrong…I missed you too! So much".

"So, friends again then?"

"We can definitely do that".

"If you'll try to make amends you should put everything on the table then" Arthur, who up to then hadn't taken a part in the conversation, said.

"What do you mean?"

"Merlin has something else to tell you". Merlin looked at him and shook his head.

"It doesn't matter anymore".

"What is it?" Percival asked. "It is about Gwaine isn't it?"

"Merlin, if you don't I will".

And so Merlin told them everything about that night that he got beaten. How Gwaine let those men harm him, laughing and enjoying it. And Percival and Freya felt that, no matter how much they apologized it wasn't going to be enough.

They had got up there to heal Arthur, but now Merlin had found his peace too. He found his old friends, the part of him that was missing for months, and for the first time after what seemed like ages, everything seemed to be hopeful.


	13. Chapter 13

_I'm trying to update as fast as I can…_

…

Everything turned to normal pretty soon. When they returned home Arthur was ready to move on and Merlin, not only he had his friends back, but they all seemed to fit together very well. They were now a group: Arthur and Merlin, Leon and Morgana, Lancelot and Gwen, Percival and Freya. There were some very good news awaiting for them upon their return. Gwen was pregnant and Leon and Morgana were getting married! Arthur couldn't believe his ears! No one could ever imagine Morgana having a permanent relationship let alone getting married. Poor Leon! Arthur and Merlin had taken some decisions too.

First of all they were moving. Again… Lancelot and Gwen were already living in a nice big house just outside the city now that their family was growing, and Leon and Morgana had bought a house too in the same neighborhood. Arthur wanted for his and Merlin's relationship to evolve and he was ready to take it to the next level. So what would be better from a house in the suburbs, amongst their closest friends? Merlin was reluctant at first but after seeing his partner's face lighting up when they passed a (undeniably perfect) house a few blocks from Morgana's new place he couldn't really resist him. Secondly, Arthur was to start his own business from scratch; he was the best in marketing who was out there anyway, in addition to the Pendragon name. He didn't need the money but he didn't like to stay idle either so with Merlin's encouragement and Morgana's help (who had also become a shareholder after leaving Uther's company when Arthur found himself in the hospital) he managed to make the most successful marketing enterprise in the entire London. Morgana was always voicing out her belief that their father would be fuming as it turned out that they had stole most of his clients. Many people were going to Pendragon Corp for Arthur as it seemed. Arthur however couldn't bring himself to care; he didn't need to make his father proud anymore, he wouldn't even call him father when they were referring to him.

Merlin on the other hand, had decided to leave his job in the bookstore after Arthur insisting on it. He knew that it wasn't what the young man wanted from his life, and since they didn't have economical problem, he persuaded him to go back to college and study art, his childhood dream. Merlin didn't go down without a fight though; he didn't want to depend on anyone and at first he felt insulted when Arthur offered him money. And then Arthur got all sentimental, saying the famous "what's mine it's yours" and "I'm the man in this relationship, I should provide for you" and he managed to receive a loud slap on the face. But after a round of great sex, some really good Chinese takeout, and another round of even more great sex, he was persuaded.

…..

It was their first night in their new home, and it was thoroughly celebrated despite all the boxes.

"Merlin come here for a second, will you" Arthur called from the living room.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?"Merlin screamed. "I've been knocking myself out trying to tidy everything and here you are, sitting in front of the fireplace drinking wine! How did you manage to start a fire anyway?"

Arthur pulled him down on the blanket next to him, and crashed his lips on his lover's.

"We can continue tidying up tomorrow. In the mean while we should inaugurate the place". He couldn't get Merlin naked fast enough. He pinned him on the floor and started placing wet kisses down his chest, and when he took his arousal in his mouth Merlin couldn't really complain anymore. An hour later he was coming again with Arthur inside him, thrusting his cock so brutally in him he thought he would faint.

"Fuck…We can live inside these boxes if you like…Just…Don't stop!"

…..

Arthur was Leon's best man in the wedding. A month before the ceremony Morgana announced that Merlin was going to be his maid of honor and when the rest of the company heard, even his ears were blushing. He couldn't deny her anything though, she was getting even more scary with all the anxiousness for the preparations.

"See? I told you I'm the man in this relationship" Arthur's remark managed to earn him another slap on the face, this time in front of a smirking Morgana. He would never hear the end of this.

A week before the ceremony, the bubble of happiness deflated though. Merlin and Arthur were shopping tuxedos when they happened upon Gwaine from all people. Arthur immediately took a defensive position, pulling Merlin beside him, away from the other man, and nodded his head in acknowledgment. Gwaine ignored him and addressed to Merlin at first.

"I don't think that blue is your color, Merlin. What about pink?" Arthur was ready to either retort or punch him (he wasn't sure) but Merlin grabbed his hand and refrained him from doing anything stupid.

"Let's just change and go ok? We have already chosen anyway". Arthur nodded again and retreated without turning his back though.

"Listen, Merlin" Gwaine stopped them. "I'm just…I'm really sorry…I just say things like that when I'm nervous, you know?"

"No Gwaine, I don't know…I don't even know who you are anymore, but you are certainly not the man I used to know".

"You are right…I've said some things that I didn't mean".

"It didn't look like it…At least Freya's sister doesn't seem to think so". Arthur chimed in.

"I meant them at the moment but…after that event I paused and thought…What am I doing? You know? I'm not at all used or comfortable with you two being gay and together but…I apologize for saying those things to you. You still are the same person, and you don't deserve any of my crap. I hope you can't forgive me, both of you… I really missed you Merlin".

"I forgive you Gwaine. The words didn't really hurt me, I never cared about anyone's opinion, you know that. But coming from you…That was…unexpected to say at least".

"There is something else you don't know…About the night you ended at the hospital".

"I already know…I saw you…"

"And you are still here talking to me…"

"I am…And I would really appreciate it if we could stop talking about that. It took me a great deal to forgive and forget Gwaine, even when you couldn't just look at me, you were already forgiven".

"So? Where do we stand?"

"I forgive you, but you can't really expect to let you in my life again that simply. You have a long distance to cross and it turned out we didn't know each other very well. We could start with that".

"I'll take it. Thank you, Merlin…It means a lot, really".

"You can't be serious!" Arthur yelled at Merlin when they left the shop and Gwaine behind.

"Not really…I don't plan to call him or anything…I just thought to be polite for old time's sake".

"You won't call him but you have really forgiven him don't you?"

"Well…I'm not the kind of person who holds grudges against people".

"No, I guess you are not".

"Because if I was, I should have stop talking to you the day you suggested I was a woman…".

"Merlin?"

"Hmm?"

"Shut up".

"Make me".

Arthur didn't need any more invitation.


	14. Chapter 14

_I tried a humoristic scene at first… Let me know if you liked it!_

…..

"Stop laughing!" Merlin was wrathful. "Stop it or I'll punch you!"

"Really, M_er_lin! That was the most girlish thing that has ever happened… Morgana, that was brilliant!" Morgana glared back at Arthur who was holding back his tears (his stomach aching from laughter and his whole body shaking) and smirked. It was the morning after Leon's and Morgana' s wedding and the whole gang was at their home bidding them farewell. They were leaving that afternoon for their two weeks honeymoon.

"I always have great ideas dear brother… And stop pouting Merlin! It's so unattractive…"

"Oh you evil….crake! You did it on purpose didn't you?"

"Oh hush now! How was I suppose to know that you were going to catch the bouquet?"

"Well there wasn't going to be any chance of me catching it if you hadn't made me stand up there with all the twenty years old, hysteric women! Thank God I am not claustrophobic; I swear they were going to trample all over me!"

"Well, Morgs… You are a little bit high-maintenance sometimes" Leon tried to cool the atmosphere but only won a glare from his wife.

"I thought it was cute" Gwen said sweetly and Merlin scowled at her.

"Sorry mate… Hormones…" Lancelot smiled but the whole conversation had already made Arthur rolling all over laughing again.

"Arthur if you don't stop it…"

"What? What are you going to do M_er_lin?"

"Well…You will not be having any sex for a whole month! How does that sound?" Merlin was really steaming up.

"Morgana! What a bad thing of you to do! You should apologize!" Arthur immediately got serious but somehow they all burst into laughter, snorting with amusement at his expression as Merlin made a _that-suits-you-well_ face.

The party broke when Arthur and Merlin drove the newlyweds at the airport, returning home shortly after.

…

"What is it with you when you see me trying to get some work done" Merlin smirked, trying to wash some dishes while Arthur kept trying to grope him that same evening.

"Well, I stopped teasing you about the flowers so now it's time to collect my prize, don't you think?"

"Oh…I quit! Fuck me now and you better make it worth it" and Arthur didn't need to be told twice. At the end it was worth it (and all over the place, mind you).

They were snuggling on their king-sized bed when Merlin's phone rang. Arthur gave a growl and released him from his grasp.

"Who is it? It's two in the bloody morning".

"It's a phone code from Ealdor. Something must have happened". They were both immediately at their feet.

"Hello…What? Are you sure? No this can't be true…" Arthur was getting nervous hearing only his lover's responses and seeing his face becoming paler and paler. And then Merlin just collapsed. Arthur grabbed the phone from his still hand and tried to get some information. He finally hung up and rushed to Merlin's side, lifting him to the bed still unconscious. He reached for his own phone.

"Lancelot, I'm sorry for waking you but I need your help".

"Arthur? Calm down… What happened".

"Merlin's home in Ealdor caught fire…His mother…His mother didn't make it. I must go to the hospital for the arrangements but I need someone to stay with Merlin. He passed out".

"Oh my God! I'll get Gwen there to stay with him and I'll come with you to the hospital. We'll be there in ten minutes. I'm so sorry mate".

"Yeah…Thanks".

It took them the whole morning to arrange for the funeral. The fire department said that a short circuit caused the fire while the woman was sleeping and was unable to react. Arthur drove with Lancelot by his side to the small village immediately after, hoping that he could find something to bring back to Merlin as a memory but there was nothing left. The house was burnt to the ground, and the woods were still smoking. When he returned home, Merlin wasn't aware at all of his surroundings. Gwen said that he hadn't eaten anything all day and she only managed to make him swallow some water. He was surprised to find Leon and Morgana there though.

"Gwen called us and we took the first flight to London. I'm so sorry". Morgana hugged her brother who had let his tears fall, upon realizing that he should now face Merlin. He walked to their bedroom were the young man was lying on the bed, holding a pillow tight to his chest. He lied down next to him and stroke his hair at the nape of his head.

"I'm so sorry baby…Shhh…"

"Arthur?" Merlin acknowledged someone for the first time that morning.

"Yes love, it's me…I'm here now…Everything is going to be alright".

"Just hold me, ok?"

"Always Merlin… Always…"

"I don't understand how this could have happen" he was sobbing on Arthur's chest, tears coming down ceaselessly. "I should have been with her".

"There was nothing you could have done baby".

"I could have helped her. I could have saved her".

"There is nothing you could have done. I saw the place Merlin. Even the firemen couldn't go in. Don't do this to yourself baby, this is not your fault. You could only get hurt too".

"Arthur?"

"Hmm" the blond man murmured in his raven hair.

"Thank you for taking care of everything today. I don't think I could deal with all this".

"I love you, you know that?"

"I love you too. Just be patient with me for a while", said Merlin with pain, realizing that he wasn't at all patient with Arthur in the past.

…

The funeral was too crowded. All of Merlin's friends were there; even those who he hadn't seen for years. Gwaine was there too, and Merlin found his presence rather comforting after so long. He was doing well too, Morgana had satiated him with pills. But when he saw Uther, holding a simple red rose his mind went blank from the remembrance of the pain he had caused them. It was too much to deal with in a single day.

"I don't want him here" his grip on Arthur's arm tightened. The older boy turned around and only then spotted his father. He released Merlin to Leon and walk up to him.

"What are you doing here?"

"Arthur I… I came to pay my respects", Uther Pendragon was nervous for the first time in his whole life.

"You didn't even know her".

"I know… I just…"

"Look, I don't really care at all" Arthur interrupted. "All that matters is that Merlin doesn't want you here and, to be honest, neither do I".

"Look, son…"

"Don't you dare call me that! I'm not your son anymore!" He raised his voice and glanced briefly at Morgana. She nodded like she was answering some unsaid question. "And by the looks of it, you don't have a daughter anymore either. You know she's married?"

"I know".

"And yet, you decided to show up on the funeral of a woman you didn't even know instead of her wedding. That tells us a lot".

"It seems that I'm unwelcomed here" the whole church was now staring at them. "I'll guess I should go".

And once again, Uther Pendragon turned his back at his children instead of staying there and talk.

…

_Reviews are precious to me! Thanks for reading this…_


	15. Chapter 15

_Do you think I should kill Uther too or not? It's really tempting giving him a heart-attack _

…

Arthur war rushing through the ER with Merlin following him hastily, both of them searching for Lancelot frantically. They saw him pacing like a maniac in a long corridor and walked towards him trying to make any sense out of what he was muttering.

"Lance? What happened?" Arthur was the first to reach him.

"I….I don't know…"

"Just relax mate, breathe".

"One moment we were sleeping and the other I woke up to Gwen screaming. I turned the light on and I saw her lying in a pool of blood…I don't know what happened".

"What did the doctors say?"

"Nothing…They took her into surgery and no one has come out yet. If anything happens to her or the baby I…"

"What's wrong?" Morgana yelled from the other end of the corridor, just arriving at the hospital along with Leon.

"Come on, let's go grab some coffee and I'll explain on the way" Merlin took them away not wanting to put Lancelot through this again. The man gave him a sigh of relief.

Even Morgana was out of words when they returned to the ER. She couldn't imagine the shock that Lancelot went through, plus she was really worried about Gwen and the baby.

"Mr DuLac?" a doctor finally spoke to them. Lancelot was at his feet in an instant. "We are doing everything we can to save them both, but your wife has lost too much blood. You need to be prepared".

"Prepared for what?" Merlin was the only one with the courage to ask, the only one who had dealt with an actual loss recently.

"There may come the time that you'll need to choose who we need to save between the two of them. I really hope things won't go that far". The doctor went back to the surgery and Lancelot started sobbing on Arthur's shoulder.

While waiting, Merlin and Morgana went to get some things from Gwen's house as all of them refused to accept the fact that she may not get through this. The young woman allowed herself to cry finally when alone with Merlin, Gwen was her best friend since forever. Merlin was astonished, it wasn't often to see Morgana in that state but he promised her not to mention anything to the rest.

…

The doctors managed to save the baby but Gwen was still very weak and unconscious. They were keeping her asleep till her system was back to normal and she didn't have seen her baby yet. She had a beautiful baby boy; Lancelot couldn't keep his eyes off and none of them actually. It was the first kid in their little company and it was going to be very spoiled by the looks of it.

Leon finally persuaded Lancelot to go home and rest while Arthur and Merlin stayed at the hospital in case Gwen would wake up. They were staring at the sleeping baby in his premature baby crib.

"He is so beautiful…I think he looks like Gwen" Arthur said in reverie.

"Do you ever think about it?" Merlin asked, his voice low.

"Think about what?"

"Kids…Having a family of your own someday".

"Sometimes I do, yes. And you?"

"I think about it all the time but only because I know that you do…You always wanted a family".

"And how do you know that? We have never discussed this before".

"Morgana…"

"Of course…"

"I'm sorry I can't give you everything you want Arthur".

"Well, men can't have babies since…I don't know…forever…"

"Brat" Merlin muttered under his breath.

"It's a choice I've made consciously Merlin" he put his arms around the other man's body and held him close, ignoring the last comment. "So stop thinking about it too much".

"I can't…I'm scared that at some point it will bring us apart".

"I love you baby, and that's what matters. And I know that you love me too and that's enough for me".

"For now…"

"Forever".

"Would you tell me though? If someday you will wake up and realize that you want something more from your life, that I'm not enough, that you finally want a family…Would you tell me?"

"Honestly?"

""No! Lie to me!"

"I would never tell you"

"Why not? You would willingly put yourself to misery?"

"I would never tell you because you are the world to me. I know that the moment you would know something like that, you will think that the best way for me to be happy will be to leave me. And that's a risk I am not willing to take Merlin. So I'm going to shut it up and spend the rest of my life with you because I know that you will always come first".

Merlin turned around to face him, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

"That's the most beautiful thing you have ever told me".

"What are you talking about. I'm always saying nice things to you…And do even more nicer things…"

"I can't argue with the last part…The sex is magnificent!" Merlin exclaimed.

"Shhh…We are in a hospital Merlin".

"Sorry" the boy looked at Arthur sheepishly.

"Besides, we should have many nephews and nieces to babysit in the future. We are going to be the cool uncles that the kids would come to, and don't worry about the drama at all". Arthur tried to light the mood of his lover. Merlin couldn't hold back his grin.

"I love you Arthur Pendragon" Merlin pushed a fierce kiss on his lips until someone coughed behind them.

"Merlin, I know that my friend is irresistible but I don't think that this is a good sight for my son. Get a room, mate!"

"What are you doing here Lance" Arthur rolled his eyes. "Shouldn't you be resting or something?"

"I couldn't sleep. I wanted to be here just in case something happens".

"Nothing is going to happen. The doctors will wake Gwen up tomorrow and in a few days you can take them both home".

"Yeah I know! Oh and by the way…there is no way I'm going to let you two babysit my kids if you don't prove that you can keep your hands off of each other!"

"You little dirty eavesdropper!" Merlin chuckled. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Enough…Oh come on…It was so cute to resist!"

"It was, wasn't it? I'm a very lucky man".

"Ok…I'm going to go inside before I get stuck with all the honey".

….

A week and a half later, Gwen, Lancelot and the new member of their family were back home, welcomed by their friends with tons of blue balloons and non alcoholic drinks much to Morgana's dismay. It was a baby shower after all, although the baby was already born…prematurely…

A phone rang and Morgana's face fell immediately when she saw the caller id on the screen.

"What's wrong sis? It's like you've seen a ghost".

"I wish. It's Uther again. Can't we just have a moment in peace?"

"I think you should go and talk to him" Merlin dared, earning two very mean glares from the Pendragon brother and sister.

"You threw him out yourself love, and now you want me to go visit him?"

"Well, I was having a really bad day but later I appreciated the fact that he came. Look, all I'm trying to say is that maybe he is trying to make things better; you are his children after all".

"I wouldn't believe that for a sec" Morgana said exasperated.

"My mom" Merlin's voice fell at the word "took it bad at first but she came around. Maybe he just needs a chance to do so too".

"No way Merlin…You have no idea how he is".

"Please baby, for me…Just answer one of his calls at least…Maybe there is something wrong. You three only have each other".

Neither Arthur nor Morgana could resist Merlin's puppy-eyed look.

"Ok" Morgana sighed. "The next time he calls I'll promise to answer".

"And if he doesn't soon?"

"Then I'll have Arthur to call him" she smirked earning a smack on the head by her brother.

"Great…Now where is the wine?"

…..

AN: Thanks again for reading this.


	16. Chapter 16

_Thank you all for my other finished story._

_Here comes the update…_

…

Morgana's philanthropic events where the biggest talk in town and this year even more so as it was the first time she was organizing one as the owner of a company alongside her brother and not under the shadow of their father.. She would always rightly choose a cause or an institute which needed the more help, but she would also manage to do so so glamorously that every paper would praise her for a few days after. This year she had chosen an orphanage at one of the poorest neighborhoods in town, totally supported by the state and therefore not so well-funded.

Merlin and Leon were with her at the orphanage the whole day, helping with the catering and reporters and ordering people around. They all insisted that Arthur should arrive later in the evening to make a grand entrance as it would be fit for someone with his status and also to show everyone that he had the complete control of the company. Arthur thought that it was completely ridiculous of course, Morgana held a similar position, but she wouldn't hear of it; he was the main shareholder and the mind behind the business, she was only helping around.

_**-later that day-**_

"Arthur if you don't stop this right now we are going to be late", Merlin had return home a few hours prior the event while Morgana had control over the whole situation. He had to shower and change into something fancier as his partner had insisted that he would be the one to accompany him at the event. He felt it was about time to make it more official. Besides, Merlin needed to help Arthur get dressed too as he couldn't even tie his own shoelaces as he so tactfully claimed, let alone decide what color his shirt should be to much the rest of his outfit. He was like a five-year old child waiting to be taken care of. Even Merlin couldn't help him though while being distracted.

"Arthur, I'm serious! Let me just have my shower and go! This is your night after all, it wouldn't be fit to arrive late".

"You are right baby…This is my night and I'm sooo nervous…I just need some stress-relief". The blond man said as he stepped in the shower too.

"Don't do it…" Merlin warned him desperately. He knew he couldn't resist much longer if Arthur kept touching him all over and kissing him so passionately; his resistance was so pathetic when it came to this…And he knew that if he would give in right now they will both be screwed…

"Ok, so if I'll give you a quick blow will you leave me alone?"

Arthur paused confused.

"Do you think that this is what this is about? Just pleasure? I'm sorry Merlin for just wanting to be with you…Won't happen again". Arthur placed a towel around himself and stepped in the bedroom a bit hurt.

"Damn! Arthur wait…That's not what I meant". Merlin followed him immediately, mimicking his actions.

"Leave it Merlin. I thought you were anxious about getting there in time" Arthur dried himself and started dressing. Merlin sighing, took the shirt out of his lover's hands and put himself into his arms.

"Why don't you understand? I want you too but… I'm really nervous about this entire thing. It's our first public appearance and you are a very well-known person. Everyone will be watching us and you know I can't even walk straight most of the time. I don't want anything to go wrong".

"You've never showed any nervousness before. Why now?" Arthur hugged him back and breathed in his smell.

"It's just that…everyone is going to be there…I don't want to embarrass you or anything, Arthur".

"You are never going to embarrass me love" he kissed his forehead.

"Say that again when I'll trip over my two feet" Merlin tried to joke.

"Well, even if you do I'll be right there to pick you up… No need to worry…Now give me that shirt or we ARE going to be late".

Merlin looked at the piece of clothing he was holding.

"You are not seriously going to wear that?"

"Why not?"

"Well…It's pink?"

"So?"

"Ahhh…Just wear this one" he tossed a blue one at him and started getting ready too.

…

Everything went really well actually. They were on time, Merlin didn't manage to fall and there was not too much gossip when people saw them entering together hand-in-hand. In the end Merlin didn't really care; just Arthur smiling at him like that was enough to keep concentrated. The evening went well for the two Pendragon's and managed to gather a big amount of money for the orphanage.

It was time to leave when Arthur and Merlin went searching for the bathroom. Instead of that they stumbled upon a boy around five years-old sitting on the floor, crying. Arthur kneeled next to him.

"What's wrong little one?"

"Th..they are g..going to..to take her".

"Who?"

One of the social workers turned around the corner of the corridor and upon seeing them she sent the little boy to his room.

"What's wrong with him?"Merlin asked sadly.

"It's a really sad story. He and his baby-sister came here a few weeks ago; their parents died on a car crash. A couple came in today and wanted to adopt the baby and now they are to be separated. The poor boy has been crying himself out the whole morning".

"Didn't you explained this to the couple? Maybe they would like to adopt them both?"

"We did but…They are really young…They just wanted the baby…There is nothing we can do, there is no law protecting the siblings. They will be here in a couple of days to take her but…if we had any other choice we would do anything to keep them together".

The ride home was quiet as the two men were trying to comprehend what they had learned. Merlin didn't have a large family, well he didn't have any family at the moment, so he knew what was like to feel alone and abandoned. Arthur on the other hand was thinking of Morgana. Although sometimes she was a pain in his ass, he had come to rejoice the day his father brought his step-sister home. He couldn't even dare to imagine how his life would have been if they didn't have each other. She was the one who would stand by him no matter what.

"That poor kids!"Merlin said when they entered their bedroom back home.

"Yeah, I know…They only have each other and now…"

They changed and tried to get some sleep but none would come. They were both tossing around the bed sheets, sighing exasperatedly.

"I just wish there was something we could do" Arthur suddenly exclaimed in the middle of the night.

"Yeah, me too! He was so sad…They don't deserve this. The little girl will probably never know she has a brother".

They stayed silent for a few seconds until their heads snapped. They looked in each other's eyes intently, a sudden realization coming upon both of them. They both smiled, sharing a look of understanding.

"So you aren't thinking…" Arthur dared.

"I'm thinking whatever I'm thinking…What are you thinking?"

"This doesn't even make any sense Merlin".

"It does in my head!"Merlin argued.

"Go figure…"

"So…you think we are ready?"

"Yes I do…You?" Arthur was hesitant.

"Yeah me too!"

"Ok then…I will call the orphanage at the morning, right?"

"I think that it's a great idea".

"I love you Merlin".

"I love you too Arthur". The raven haired boy smiled as they just got over his greatest fear concerning their relationship.


	17. Chapter 17

_Did you like the whole adoption thing? Let me know…_

…_.._

"A baby AND a five years old? Are you two crazy?" Lancelot was nearly screaming upon hearing the news. They had all gathered at his and Gwen's house when Arthur called them and said he had to make an announcement.

"I think it's wonderful" Gwen squealed. "Just imagine all our kids playing together, growing up together! Awww…."

"Yes honey but…What I meant was that kids can be really annoying and…you know…loud".

"I didn't know you find our baby annoying".

"Well…not annoying. I'm just saying that sometimes it's too much to handle. I can't imagine having two of them so soon".

"Thanks for the support Lance" Merlin laughed at his friend's awkward face as he tried to cover up.

"Sorry mate…I…"

"What Lancelot is trying to say is that you should think this through first. We all think that it is a wonderful thing what you want to do but it is also a huge step" Leon came to his rescue.

"Yes! That's exactly what I meant, thank you very much".

"And what about you Morgs?" Arthur asked his sister. "You haven't said a word yet which I find rather peculiar". Morgana studied both him and Merlin for a while before finally speaking.

"I do think that it's a huge step to take too" she said carefully. "But I also know that you are both ready. Arthur, I've watched you growing up into being a man for a while now and I know that you can do it. And every time you did something that made me proud, Merlin was right there beside you. So yes, It's going to be a tough road but I, that is we, we all be there to help right?"

Everyone nodded in agreement and with that settled, the two boys headed back home. It was a warm evening and they decided to walk to Gwen's instead taking their car, so now they had to walk back too.

"You are not having second thoughts, do you?" Arthur asked, noting the silence. "It would be logical after what Lance said…he has more experience after all".

Merlin stopped to look at him. He cupped his face and leaned in for a quick kiss which Arthur gladly returned.

"Baby, I'm sure about this. It just…feels so right. But if you don't want to do this I will understand. There is plenty of time ahead for us".

"No Merlin…I'm sure too. I was just checking" he winked.

…

The social workers from the orphanage, where more than happy to help them with their decision. Still, there were some legal issues since both of them were men, but Arthur managed to take care of them quickly; he had many connections after all through his work. It took a little more than a month for everything to be taken care of during which they both were very busy. First of all they had to meet the kids. The little boy, John, immediately loved them when he understood that they were the reason he would stick with his sister. He was getting along better with Arthur though; he said he was more funny and that he played football much better than the clumsy Merlin. But Arthur didn't have much luck with the baby-girl, Anna, as she would start crying every time he tried to pick her up. Merlin on the other hand was the one who could always sooth her, taking her from Arthur's hands and rocking her instinctively. When the blond caught him to actually sing at her sometimes the jokes about his masculinity never stopped. But he didn't mean it…He loved Merlin and he was proud of the younger boy, he seemed to adjust very well.

Then they had to make the house ready. Good thing Arthur had insisted on buying such a large house. On the second floor now, along with their own bedroom, there were going to be the child's room and an actual nursery for crying out loud. And of course the two guestrooms, the one of which was going to be the girl's room once she grew up a little bit. Now that the place was full, Merlin couldn't think how they could live in such a big and empty house before.

The day they finally took the kids home they have asked everyone to leave them alone so they could see how they would adjust. But it turned out all their worries had been for nothing. Little kids tend to take to their environment quite easily once they feel they are loved. And they were so loved by the two boys.

A couple of days later they got to meet everyone. The scary but wonderful aunt Morgana, the too tall and funny uncle Leon, the sweet and mom-like Gwen and finally the quiet and always calm Lancelot. And if John ever wondered why he had two daddies, he never questioned them. He had a mom once, who loved him very much and he didn't need a second one. What he and his sister needed was someone to take care of them and love them; someone that they would be able to love back with all their heart. And they have found two of those people.

But something was amiss from Arthur's life; he missed his own father very much and Uther was still trying to call him and Morgana. Maybe Merlin was right, maybe he was trying to change. So, for the first time he decided to call him first and invite him home.

-A couple of days later-

"Arthur, I'm so glad you called" Uther Pendragon was sitting on his son's couch staring at him and Merlin. "And Merlin, it's nice to finally meet you too".

"I doubt it" Merlin said so only Arthur could hear him. The blond chuckled and returned his attention to his father.

"You kept calling father. I only wish to hear what you have to say to me and Morgana".

"Son…All I ever wanted to tell you was that I'm sorry. I missed you so much, both of you. I know I am a stubborn man, old-fashioned and that I didn't always treated you with the love you deserved. And I am sorry for that too. I just want you back, if you can find the heart to forgive me".

Arthur stayed silent for a while; he couldn't believe his ears, Uther apologizing and expressing feelings. All he wanted is to say that it was all forgotten, to have his father back into his life, his and Merlin's children to have their only grandfather too. But he was hesitant, especially regarding Merlin. He was hurt too by his father and it wasn't something which he could just let go. But then Merlin squeezed his hand, and he suddenly knew what he needed to do.

" Father, there is someone I would like you to meet".

And so it was, that Uther Pendragon got to meet Anna and John, his grandchildren. It was hard accepting it at first and he wasn't always so warm with them but he worked on it and as the years passed, he came to cherish them more than anything.

Uther was the last obstacle the two men had to get over. And since they managed to overcome this, they finally were whole and free to live their life and the others that were yet to come.

THE END

…

So? Bad or good? Thank you all again for reading this and for your reviews.


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